interupted daydream

bismilahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

hi mr bloggie :')
I feel like this is the only place for me to express my feelings,
this is where I can criticize, comment or giving opinion *insulting sometimes :P
the place where I feel relief after posting some unsound feeling :'(

tadi kann, I berangan berangan berangan~
I was dreaming about this one guy, entah macam mana, setiap kali pandang muka dia I rasa tenang -.-" yeah, shouldnt feel such way! holy crap! it's too early to fall into love again~we know each other through peers club I joined, semester lepas. and, banyak jugak volunteering work we did together. macam tadi, I helped UKK in handling MDAB programme, I tought I was the only one who came, rupanya dia pun ada jugak :D semangat buat kerja!heheh, jkjk :P ceritanya pasal berangan tu, tetiba angan2 itu di interupt oleh this someone that I deadly want to forget!! all the sweet moment together ws like being rewind. reminising some old good times together pulak! ya Allah, I seriously want to forget him, please ya Allah :'( terus I cuba ingat those bad moment when I was with him, saat menyakinkan hati, benci, gaduh, semua tu. but I ended up crying alone. yes, pitiful me :'(

* I was about to label the post, tapi entah kenapa 'LOVE' really doesnt suit this post :s trying so damn hard to forget!

wishful thinker

bismilahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

hi mr bloggie :') I miss you a lot!
these days are like horrible for me, ah!I dont feel like my soul is here, I somehow lost in every class!
it has been 2 weeks since the first day I started my class, yet, I dont think my mind is filled up with something!
haa, we learnt about critical thinking in BEL 313 class just now, we been tought about the barriers of being critical thinker, and I realize something about myself that stopped me from being critical. that is, I'm a wishful thinker :) (yeah, probably I'm proud of being one :P )
we have to start our speech with "I'm feeling quilty of being ______" okay, since we dont have much time for everyone to share what they are regret of, which is me, included, I would like to somehow share it here :)

I'm feeling quilty of being wishful thinker, I aim so high that whenever I couldn't get what I aimed for, I probably will punish myself. as an example, I used to write on top of my text book "ain AC1105C A+ 4.00 :) " yes, in every of my text book! how I wish I can get it!though I know, with my little effort, it could be impossible!
sometimes, I am a self serving bias too. ingat tak I pernah kiasu sebab na dapatkan fast track? yes, I studied alone!I dont care about other as long as I get what I want during that time, how selfish I'm :'( but then, the luck is not on my side, the programme is terminated, and I , have to continue doing diploma in accountancy. I went to a phsycologist to talk about how dissapointed I'm, after all the hardship I've been through, it's all like useless! tapi, she told me one great words that I will always remember as a guideline in life. I am thankful for the short moment but worth it :')

huh!lagi, please do pray for me :') I want to change myself to be a somebody. a muslim who pactising the true islam's life !

no more you

bismilahirahanirahim and asslamualaikum :')

it has been so long since my last updates
I got a room somewhere in blok K, well, blok paling hujung, terasa ke-senior-an nyaa -____-"

sebenarnya, I'm kinda missing somebody :')

ahh!macam mana nak cakap entah, everytime I think about him, I will pray to Allah, "if he's not meant for me, then keep my heart from remembering him, I'm trying to save my heart to the only one who deserve"

terasa susah sebenarnya :'(

this is my second time :(

andd, I;m not opening my heart for anyone after this!

especially someone with his name.

it kills me. twice. I've had enough.

if I can make a request to Allah, I dont want to ever meet anyone with his name dah lepas nie.
but, one thing you should know, it's never a regret knowing you :') thanx for everything :') betapa I nak buang dia dari hidup I hari tu sampai dia lalu sebelah pun I tak jeling kat dia, acting as if he's invisible though I know he's next to me :'( dear cik ct, tolong lah jaga hati kau tu!may Allah help me :')

erm, lagi, saya rindu maktab, budak2nya, environmentnya, everything! everything in mrsm langkawi!

homecoming - JENGKA

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

it's 2am now, trying to not sleep as I planned to go back to Jengka at 5am today,
well yeah, THIS TIME IS SPARTAA!
hahahahaha!
the result is still ambiguos!we, part 5 students are not given the final said. entah dapat kolej ke tidak lagi sem ni :(
tapii!I dont really care pun if ever I tak dapat bilik, sebab, rumah sewa menanti, I got a great deals too ;)
rm150 including all bills :) fully furnished
and, the transport are always available :D
so, nothing much to worry :)
ehem ehem,
ermm, I've no idea to write dahh -________-
as for this upcoming semester, I dont want to play around. the battle is still on babeh!hahah,
dulu I've once chat with a friend in sri iskandar,
asking about pursuing degree abroad, and, I'm lucky that dia tidak lokek ilmu :)
habis segalanya yang dia tahu dia beritahu!
tapi, there was a time when I feel that the programme is impossible for me. dia cakap, sri iskandar setiap sem pun ada yang 4flat! goshhh!I rasa kerdil sangat :( and, out of a sudden, I feel like the competition is quite tough! semangat I hilang entah kemana :(\
tapi, after having a conversation with a senior from mrsm langkawee, semangat I menaik balik!
I dont care what is going to happen this sem. I just want to ignore those shit and focus on my studies!
he's our role model now, he got anc for his diploma :') kena lawan niii!

I hereby, make a promise to study really hard to ensure the 4flatt! setiap sem pun x pernah dapat :( I want to atleast get a 4flat during diploma, and this is the right time. semester 5. since 5 is my favourite number ;D

doakann sayaaaa ehh???~

operation and izzue islam :(

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

done with le surgery :)
the situation was like this
dr: so how was yr teeth?
me: doesnt show any better
dr: owh, okay, nvm, we'll settle this first then next week we'll arrange another appointment..
me: ermm,
*the doctor pick his scissors and clipper
me: eh KEJAP KEJAP! dr bius dulu KANNN?!
dr: hahah, yea yea, saya bius dlu, dont worry~

haaa!cuak kau!I just close my eyes throughout the operation. dalam hati berulang kali cakap, "cepat la dr nie cakap, okay dah siap!"

after awhile I feel there is something like a thread on my face, cuba bukak mata sedikit, and yes, memang benang!I'm like a piece of fabric where the the doctor is sewing me :(
tapi tak rasaa sakit even a bit!the next appointment is on friday untuk buka balik jahitan, ada empat jahitan kau!na makan pun susa :( asyik terbayang je tengah gigit2, skali tergigit benang tu and tertarik!skali habis robek the whole mouth!whoaa!scary movie kowtt!
okay enough those nightmare :( takk na makan dah sampai jahitan dibuka~ *padahal tadi dah melantak kue tiaw goreng!hahah,,

then, everytime I saw him, my heart was like pumping harder. adakah iniiiii??? -.-" okay berangan! lahai, dia sangat teramat sweeettttttt kowt!!

THISS!

wuargggggghhhhhhhhh! boleh histeria I tahu!

sekali, look at this >

 

hahahah!tak na kau post gambar yang ada bini dia!hahah~foinee,,

take a look at this,

 

haaa, yang ini kecik je!heheh, jeles punya pasal :')

happy married yea abg izzue islam :'( huhu~
*bintak maaf gambar semua google :) hahah,,

sakit mulut

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

hai hoi hey!
hahahah, okay gilaa
erm, I just got back home from kpj ampang puteri, visiting my cousin, accident :(
haila, he's a potential football player! next week he'll represent Malaysia untuk match apatahh, at USM penang. kalau menang, dia pergi UK pulak, ada match apa tahh jugak. (I'm not into football okayy :P) amin cakap, "anak jantan kalau x cium tar, bukan lelaki namanya" *in other word, lelaki wajib accident sekali seumur hidup, owh!macam tu pulak~ tp everyone says tempat tu memang keras sikit! dekat corner heading to WW, dari s/wangsa tu, dah banyak accident kawasan tu, abah cakap, atas bukit tu ada kubur sapa tahh, hahahah!memang bnyk kepercayaan nya iya~
okay, enough about the accident

lusa, I have a dentistry appointment, kena operation :(
do pray for me :)
ahh, bukan bedah beriya pun sebenarnya, takk sampai 5 minit je pun (trying to convince my heart)
ceritanya begini, I pernah tergigit bibir, I tought it was a normal punya tergigit, sekali bengkak kauu!
merata klinik dah pergi, semua cakap, this need an operation!ahhh, memang takk laaa!kau gila!kena operation, ramai doktor berkerumun, dengan nurse lagi, kena tahan ward, dekat hospital, ada bilik mayat!owhh, terima kasih sahaja yea :P I'm not going to the hospital :P nayyyy :P (hahahah!kau ingat ini operation bersalin -.-" yang sampai tido hospital lagi -.-") the last time I went to dentistry, the doctor said, yes, he need to operate that thing, tapi doint worry, sikit je," then I asked, "sakit takk?" (cliche question) "eh no laa, masa bius tu je rasa semut gigit, then you'll feel nothing" ooowwwhhh!deyy, I can bare the pain of semut gigit ;) tapi bukan kerengga la! most of all, mungkin I rasa terpujuk to do the surgery sebab that doctor was soo nice!cakap pun lembut je~ tapi bukan pondan laa~ itu lahh yang I menyampah dekat certain goverment hospital, cakap menyombong! mungkin betul lah people said, private hospital is better than government hospital. mesra alam je!

pasal sakit mulutnya is, I guess this is the reminder from Allah :(
selama ini, I cakap lepas je, my close friends know my style!kalau pergi makan memana, if the taste doesnt suit me, then, I'll directly complaint. yes, mulut tak ada insurance~ I pernah sound macik dm di uitm for the unreasonable price of their food. dah takk pepasal macik tu da aim muka I~ tapi bayangkan laa, my friend took nasi, telur and sayur which cost her rm4!haaa, amek kau, tengah sebuk2 masa lunch time tu I serang macik tu depan orang ramai!!hahaha*devil laugh~ that macik wants to return rm1 to me, tapi I cakap, tak pe la macik, saya x kesah pun seringgit tu, cumanya saya na tanya, kenapa mahal sangat, dia cakap sebab naci banyak, haii, nasi pun rm2, pakai beras apa?mak saya pakai beras basmathi tu pun x semahal tu!banyak kali I ulang tanya pakai beras apa kauu!geram gilaa!

another recent issue, tadi, after visiting my cousin, we hadour dinner at a restaurant. masa na bayar tu, ada chinese memotong que. haihh, memang kenaa la~ selamba je dia tahu, yang I pulak, x memandang dah boyfie dia kat belakang I, kalau dah na kena pompuan nie mmg peduli la kau bawak bodyguard ke polis ke hatta ketua samseng sekali pun! because I'm at the right side, right?hahah~

ada sekali tu tengah2 shopping, berselisih dengan ada malay girl yang memakai pakaian tidak cukup kain, I dare to say she's poor, kalau kaya, mesti banyak duit na beli kain menutup badan kann?heheh,, dengan selambanya, I said to my sister "adik kalau na beli baju make sure kain dia cukup tau" pernah jugak I said, "kaklong rasa nak bukak je tudung kaklong nie sedekah dekat prempuan yang x cukup kain tu" yes, I cakap depan2 orang tu. cakap belakang tak baik kann?hee :P

jadi, I guess, sakit mulut yang takk baik2 ni sebab laser sangatt kowt O.o kena buatan orang ke? hailaa!nauzubillah!