sadden

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

hey guys! my handphone are gone :(
looking for a new phone I guess ?
ehem ehem! no daydream cik ct please ! *sedar diri kau kedekut

okay, next sadden news is,
my heaven time, free from study's burden is on 12th apr 2014,
tapii! abah just got a message stating that he got to go to vietnam on 10th apr! 4 days. works.
the question is, who's gonna fetch me at Jengkaa :(

let the time decide then :3

LOST

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

life is getting, urmm, entah ?
I just couldn't explain it. empty. lost. negativity overwhelm.

I just want the old me
the old cik ct :'(

O Allah! guide me, protect me, save me, love me. show me the way.
dear friends, do pray for me. finding the soul of cik ct :')

istiadat konvokesyen uitm pahang

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :')

allahu!today is a bigg day for uitm pahang!
istiadat konvokesyen ke-79
jawatankuasa fotografi!cewahh :P
it was totally a hectic day though..
the first sidang was for faculty of accountancy and I, without wasting any opportunity to meet the long lost seniorita! taking couple of shot with kak zatul, kak nina, kak ayu and kak ohara ANC!Allahu!I cant hold the tears. sebak. I wish my parent can see me wearing that selempang :')

having chat with kak ohara about ACCA, she gave me some advice, the do's and dont's, tips. Allah! , how I wish I can be that strong! she said, despite from all the family problem with health, she herself pun, but still, she knows what she wants and strive for it.

"dont compete with someone who is better than you, but compete with yourself. you'll feel less presure"

okayy sis!noted!do pray for my success too :')
hurmm, I couldnt transfer the pictures taken using my phone since I dont have the usb cable.
promise to upload it soon :')

haa!lagi satu!
the way the convocation held was sebijik like my majlis graduasi when I was in MRSM Langkawi :')
air mata bergenang masa perarakan masuk graduan, all the dean and pro chancelor. no kidding! sebab the flow was seriously similar with our majlis graduasi back in maktab :'S andd, lagi sekali tear drops masa they play the "anak kecil main api" punya lagu tu. I just dont know why, every time I hear that song, mesti hati rasa sebak, the lyrics is so deep. you got to understand every line of the lyric. then you'll know how I feel. plus, maybe that song was a must during our rollcall back in mrsm langkawi. we'll sing that song every morning dengan tajwid yang betul tahu! pak said yang ajar :')
arghhh!I miss all those thing in maktab. even masa menaip ni pun mata dah bergenang dah ni :'( if I could turn back time :'( Allahu!

better to stop now, sebelum lappy ni terkena electric shot sebab terkena titisan air mata -.-"

till then :)

hi-fever

bismillahirahmanirahim, assalamualaikum :)

Allah! Allah pinjamkan sedikit kudrat ni, demam dah berapa hari tah :'(
demam rindu, puihhh~
entah angin ber-virus entah dari mana yang masuk merebak dalam badan ini sampai 2 cool-fever pun tak lut -.-" tertelan jugak 2 biji paracetamol. ehh, saya bukan takut makan ubat yea, cuma tak mahu biasakan diri dengan those drugs. abah ajak pergi clinic, tapi i tak mahu, ubat yang sama je doktor tu bg nanti, antibiotic+ubat batuk+selsema+demam. apa tak ada spesis ubat lain dah ke na bagi? saya ni demam rindu ! PUIHH lagi sekali~
baru je nak elok semalam, dapat pulak email yang mengerikan, terus demam balik -.-"
tapi ni, Allah macam bukak jalan ni, Allahu!

kerinduan teramat sangat :')

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikummm :)

tak sabar na balek KL! actually, I miss mak and abah :'(
eh, can it be atleast once apa yang  mak and abah cakap tu salah ?
they are like peramal masa depan for me :') all they said are true. I just, miss them sooo muchhh :'(
ya Allah, cepat kan masa please :'(

KK. sabah. backpack. alone.

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

lamaaaaaaaa tak update :(
hi hello everyone :)
currently in Sabah for a vacation. a week. alone. waahhhh!excited huh?

actually, I cant wait to go home :'( yesterday I called my parent and abah said
"tulahh kalau na bercuti tak payah lama-lama, 3D2N pun dah okay, ni sampai seminggu!"
hurmm, abah is like being soooo understanding. he's like knowing my current feeling without me to mention :')

souviner are all ready. pasar filipina is awesome. I bought almost all souviner there. approximately 400 flies so far :( shirts, bags, shoe, keychain, pearl broche, fridge magnet, kerepek, udang kering? hahah! udang kering ni umi pesan. dah mcm xde udang kering lagi je kat KL -.-" ehem ehem, tinggal lagi 1 prob. I didnt book a luggage for my return flight. cuak jugak ni kalau beg tak lepas naik cabin :(
so far that I remember, dah pergi kota kinabalu of course, putatan, 1 Borneo, air terjun apatah, pasar filipina! hahah, excited much sebab duit banyak disedekah kan kat sana huh? I was thinking to go to sipadan island, tapi! jauh gilaa tahu! so nvm, kundasang pun macam ermm, nvm, maybe next time :( owh!lupa cakap, I was here to visit my friend who study in UMS too :) kawan langkawi, eza and era :) so, they who brought me to everywhere here :)

till then :)

I CANT WAIT TO GO HOMEE ! hehe,,

lappy xde jarang hapdate :(

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

today is 28th august 2013 :) two days after my birthday :D
alhamdullilah, Allah gave me a chance to still alive and breath in this world :) what a bless :D
ehem ehem, actually, I didnt bring my baby lappy :( and that's why I dont really do some updates recently, huhu..

ahh, there's alot to update actually!tapi,,ni pinjam lappy kawan, tak kan na buat ghete pulak kann, hehe ;P

the one less travelled by

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

and I took the one less travelled by.

ah, I just love this quote from 'the road not taken'
the poem really reflect me. what I'm currently going through.
above all, I hope that Allah always be by my side :')

yesterday, when visiting maklong, *though I dont really like them, sebab they who influence my parent to force me doing diploma. ah cerita lama usah dikenang. okay, lets continue, maklong dengan riaknya said, yana will further her degree in march since she will finish her dip this oct. and I was like -_________- speechless. selamat mak ada back up. mak said, my lect advice me to do professional after diploma, since my result is quite good. tapi paklong cakap, rugi la kalau professional terus, degree xde. nak je hati kecil ni cakap "dah memang banyak rugi pun sekarang" urghh, that's why Im telling you, maybe this is my path, my journey. I took the one less travelled by.
itu soal belajar. ini soal masa depan pulak.

I just dont know why, whenever I'm at home, I couldnt act as if I'm a teenager. I mean, I'm acting like a kid! tak matang langsung. I called my sister by nicknames, teasing them, take things not seriously, tak dapat makan, buat muka, tadi kereta abah tak dapat start, and I was the first who said, "kaklong na naik tritton cik nuar, diri kat belakang!" out of a sudden! everyone was like busy looking at our car, yet me? patutnya I pergi lah tengok2 bonet kereta tu, bajet2 makenik ke kann? ya Allah, you will have no idea if you ever seen me when I'm with my family. mesti akan terlintas dalam fikiran, "kesian budak ni terencat -.-" with my baby-face looking, my size, my height, the way I talk infront of my family. orang akan cakap I anak last -.-"

owh yes, during my first raya, balek kampung! yeay! okay takk, at rumah tok acu, there is one lady sedara mara mak juga lahh, have mistakenly thought syada is the kaklong, sara is kakngah and me?is the youngest one! darjah enam pulak dia guess tu! haa, to think of it, ini tidak bagus!dulu yes, bagus, because I can still collect duit raya from them. tapi makin tua ni, takut mak mertua tersilap meminang nanti acano?!cakap na meminang kaklong which they thought syada tu kaklong! kang dapat hadiah langkah bendul den kang! or, jalan2 raya, sedara mara spot syada dulu na di jodoh kan dengan anak memasing. owh cik ct pemikiran kau terlalu di luar kemampuan manusia normal berfikir -.-" haa! tapi betul kan cerita drama selalu macam nie?!

okay dah penat mengarut. till then :)

malam raya punya cerita

bismillahirahmanirahim and asslaamualaikum everyone!

hello hey hi!
haa, na ceritaa!
I just called abang tadi :')
kat sana still on fasting, but, probably dah berbuka lah now,
he just went back from grocery, buying some stuff to cook rendang.
"kau buat apa tu?"
"den baru balek kedai ni, beli barang2 na buat rendang"
"haa?pandai ke kau masak?"
"haa, boleh la sikit2"
"kau lepak malaysian hall lah esok?"
"takk ah, den keja esok, kat sini xdenya na cuti2 mcm kat malaysia tu"
"woah!tripple la kau dpt nie?"
"tak ahh, den buat voluntary work je nie huh,"
"owhh, btw, kuih kegemaran kau ada nie huh, umi siap masak nasi beriyani nasi tomato sbagai nie"
"eleh kau x den heran nye der, kat sini pun rasa jugak sambutan raya nya"

*okay to be truth, den yang jeles kat kau tahu! I wish I were in his shoe :'( tak pe cik ct. raya kali nie last kau ada kat malaysiaa, next year is my turnn!

then then, we went to ulu kelang, searching for lemang, and ketupat, and lontong.
since mak dont like the boiled nasi impit sebab, it is wrapped with plastics, so we prefered to buy lontong. yes, beli yea, xde masanya na mengayam bagai. #bajet keyy ell :P

and other mory is,
saya rindu abang !
eh tak, bukan bukan,
other mory is,
I'm happy!smile me smile me :)))
I got a text message from him :D haa, you make my heart melt!
thanx though :') thanx sangatt, cheering me in your own way. I know you're sweet! ahh :P
cant stop smiling lah pulakk! hahah~

okay, tukar cerita laen before me getting insane!

haa! my wish for this raya is, dear mr stomach, please enlarge now, I have to make preparation for tommorrow, all the good food are waiting for me, I just cant simply ignore them laying on the table tastefully. tadi after berbuka, makan sikit pun dah kenyang macam makan 10 ekor kerbau!cemana esok? or maybe I can skip herbalife for one day like pleaseeee :') but nayy!people are starring at mom mcm dah kurus sngt je gayanya! this is not aci! I starts consuming herbalife dulu hokeyh!hurmm,
or maybe I can get external stomach for tomoro? harharhar~

and, guess what, I'm currently mentoring abang cooking rendang!huhu :'( and so much other gossip.
abang told me that he's doing some charity work, nursing kids kat sana. age between 2-6 cmtu, and those kids sangat manja dengan dia! ahh, pentipu! he's not that mercy towards kids, WORLD HAS COME TO AN END lah jawabnya~hahahah,,
andd, much more other gossip kat facebook :(including his wish to mengumpat esok. sebab, it's our routine on every first syawal to lepak together, catch up cerita masing2 as well as mengumpat! tapi, no more this time punya raya :'(
den datang sheffield lah cmtu? harharhar #lawak hambar~

till then :')

to my dearest adik-adik KACA :)

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

first sekali akak na mintak maaf sebab ambik masa korunk sekejap :)
erm, since kertas kata2 akak hari tu kecik, atas alasan na jimat kertas -_-" andd, tulisan akak teramatlah sukar lagi payah dibaca! tp xpe, kalau korunk na kutuk tulisan tu buruk pun xpe, sebab korunk bukan lah org pertama atau kesepuluh, dah beratus-ratus org cakap tulisan akak buruk -.-"

so, kali nie akak na cakap, well, pengalaman mengajar kita kehidupan sebenar. tak salah untuk jatuh, Nabi Muhammad SAW pernah cakap, kalau jatuh di tempat sama 2 kali tu yang teruk. kita ada pilihan! korunk sume baru part 2 and 3, masih ada banyak masa untuk berubah :) if ada dlm kalangan korunk yg pergi kaca for second time, tu bukan bermakna korunk jatuh 2 kali, tp, akak percaya, korunk da berusaha, ingat nie, Allah see yr effort, bukan final result. as long as korunk dah berusaha, nescaya Allah tu akan bagi jugak nanti :)

lagi, akak na bercerita (owh, tahu korunk mesty ckp akak nie suka bercerita kan? ) x peduli apa korunk ckp :P sebab, org cakap, lagi kita tua, lagi banyak pengalaman kita, yang mana baik korunk buat teladan, yang mana buruk, jadikan sempadan, dont be like those yang dah tahu benda tu buruk, tapi still buat benda yang sama! okay, akak na cakap, kalau korunk tengok semua orang2 yang berjaya mesty ada payah dulu, ah! itu common~ korunk pun boleh fikir kann? akak na cerita, macam mana akak boleh jadi diri akak sekarang, akak pun pernah gagal, selain gagal kimia, gagal akaun and ape tah lagi segala kegagalan yang akak cerita hari tu, akak na cerita, apa yang buat akak bangkit dari kegagalan tu semua.

akak ada matlamat.

semua pun akak pasti ada matlamat masing2 kann? okay, matlamat akak buat masa sekarang, akak teringin gilaa na fly, belajar kat luar negara, even kalau korunk baca post2 akak yg sebelum nie pun, banyak kali akak post betapa hati akak nie na fly abroad. satu je na ckp, kalau korunk rasa payah, ingat balek matlamat korunk tu. masa mula-mula sesi ta'aruf kita tu, akak tengok muka masing2 semua bukan macam muka seorang yang gagal, kalau akak jumpa tepi jalan ke apa, akak akan kata dlm hati nie semua muka budak2 pandai! no kidding :) cahaya muka korunk tu ada, cuma mugkin korunk je x sedar dengan potensi diri korunk lagi. apa yang korunk perlukan cuma semangat and matlamat yang jelas.

okay akak faham, majoriti semua tak tahu sistem pointer, sistem universiti semua tu kan? tak pe, akak na cerita, ada kakak senior akak, dia x dekan pun sem 1, sebab culture shock kan, tapi betapa hebatnya dia, sem 2 onwards dye dpt dekan! tak ANC, tp grad first class. korunk boleh buat! dengar tu muzamir! you can get dekan after this! (sbb dye yg tanya hari tu, akak lupa na cerita pasal nie hari tu) even semua pun akak doakan dapat dekan! korunk cuma perlu tahu apa yang korunk nak. masih tak terlambat sebenarnya. all you need to do is believe in yourself :) ada sorang kawan akak x pernah dekan since part1, tapi dye keep on berusaha, last2 dye dekan sem lepas! ada lagi kwn akak repeat paper, betapa susahnya dye na catch up balik dengan kami2 nie, tp last2, sekarang nie part5, dah boleh blajar secara normal balik. all you need is usaha yang istiqamah! and, always percaya dengan diri korunk. even akak percaya dengan korunk kenapa tidak korunk sendiri kann?

sebenarnya akak ada banyak lagi tips2 belajar na kongsi dengan korunk, tp masa amat lah mencemburui kita :( tapii! kalau korunk ada nak share, tanya, minx pendapat ke apa, share je dgn akak!insyaAllah, mana yang boleh tolong tu akak tolong. mana yg x boleh tu akak usahakan tanya org lain how to help you :) masalah org tak semuanya sama, jadi kalau korunk na tanya cne na belajar maths, hafal subjek yang tahap kena rebus buku tu minum air dia baru boleh dpt A, or, korunk lemah english, na tau how to atleast pass in exam. na minta ajar subjek or even na study sesama akak ke?huhh, much pleasure! mungkin dengan itu korunk lagi berdisiplin ke nanty?sbb akak kan da mmg berdisiplin, cewahh! jkjk :P tapi siesly akak na ckp, kalau korunk ada masalah na share, sila jangan segan text akak, kol ke apa. akak mmg willing na tolong!buat apa ada ilmu tapi sorokkan kann? lastly, na ckp,

I have faith in you, akak yakin, percaya korunk boleh punya!

syidi, jgn banyak main! focus! akak tengok hari tu pun you dah siap ada geng2 sendiri dah,tp berkawan ada batasannya, choose friend wisely :) akak na cerita, dulu pun akak ada geng2 sendiri, memang kerja cari pasal dgn org, mengumpat bagai. jumpa tepi jalan mana yang x sedap mata memandang tu memang kena lah dgn ktorg, tapii, akak choose to change. one of the way is, jauhkan diri dari geng2 akak tu, memang lah susah. tp akak ingat matlamat akak. tp kadang2 tu hang out jugak lah dgn dorg, cuma x selalu. I have my own vision :)

ki,,kalau ada masalah, share, jgn pendam sorang2,,akak tengok termenung je slalu, x elok tahu! kalau ada na mslh, share dgn org lain,,or, lukis2 macam hari tu. ambik A4 sehelai, huh, conteng je apa2 na conteng. akak tau, kadang2 xde sape yg faham kita ke apa, andd, macam blog akak nie, kalau akak stress sangat, akak luahkan kat blog nie, we have our own way to express feelings right?

muzamir, I think I know you, pernah daftar ahli peers dulu kann? akak ada list nama tu, andd, kalau you pernah dpt msg pasal peers, akak lah yang hantar tu! we, exco and ajk peers, ada sort of adik2 bawah tuk spread msg pasal peers, and you under me :) ermm! ANC x determine kejayaan seseorang tau, lagi bagus kalau you pernah gagal and you bangkit semula, that will differentiate you with others. think further, kalau interview kerja nnty, cerita kat majikan yg you pernah gagal and bangkit to this far, mesty majikan tu impress and hire you! kan lagi baik? gituu,,

basirah,, I know environment SR macam mana, mesty fun kann? macam mana fun nya outdoors, macam tu jugak lah akak na you fun dlm belajar! or mybe you can treat yrself? lepas belajar 1 chapter, pergi main petaque sejam dua, baru berbaloi2 kann? buat something you like after the hardship :) lukis2 ke? dah ada bakat dah hari tu tengok,,

alia, jgn memalas! rasa malas, mengantuk ke apa, ckp kat syitan tu, bisik kat dia balik, "aku tak kan ikut kata kau" pastu bangun, buat kerja yg rasa malas tu, then, gelak kat syiton tu, sebab you wont be decieved by him :P

siti,, huhh, susah na hafal yea? cani, pagi2 makan kismis 7 biji, kismis brand legoada jual kat kedai 2 ringgit, jangan kunyah, biar je dalam mulut lama2,,sambil tu niat dalam hati, masa ambil wudhuk pun sama, sampai kat kepala tu, sambil basuh kepala tu pun niat jugak na kuat daya ingatan :)

cik ty, erm, mula2, nampak pendiam, dah lama2 tu you're not that badd ;) all you need to do is, biasakan diri dengan suatu yang baru, life dekat U mesti kena cepat adapt dengan suasana baru. kalau ada benda na cakap, cakap dengan lantang, sebab bila you konfiden, orang lain tak boleh lemahkan kita lagi dah. macam akak, dalam kelas ke apa, lagi-lagi kalau kena speaking, I speak confidently, padahal, banyak kesalahan tatabahasa, cakap bukan berasaskan fakta pun, tapi sebab akak konfiden, semua org yang dengar macam terpana, so, konfiden yea!

ekin, dah bagus dah ada matlamat, na tolong family, you have the vision!so, ingat, setiap kali rasa malas na belajar, ingat that vision :) ingat, bukan senang untuk senang, belajar kena dari hati, baru senang ilmu na masuk :)

intan, seriously it is not too late to change! kos sains memang tough, akak pernah ada roomate yang kos sains, hari2 tengok dia menghadap buku, kitorg tido, dia buku lagi, bangun pagi pun buku lagi, so, I want you to be like her!buat nota. and dengar sini, buat nota bukan untuk lecture. buat untuk kefahaman diri sendiri :) macam bio, fizik, kaitkan dengan kehidupan seharian. baru senang na ingat :)

andd, last untuk korunk semua, ingat nie, kalau ada pape, mintak kat Allah, Dia tak kan pernah bagi something yang sia2 kat kita :) na cakap dengan Allah, solat, doa. na dengar apa kata Allah, baca Quran. baca tafsir :) akak doakan semua adik2 akak nie berjaya dunia dan akhirat :) kalau ada apa2, msg je akak. na tanya apa2, tak faham apa2, you can always count on me! ;) good luck yea untuk final nanti :)

interupted daydream

bismilahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

hi mr bloggie :')
I feel like this is the only place for me to express my feelings,
this is where I can criticize, comment or giving opinion *insulting sometimes :P
the place where I feel relief after posting some unsound feeling :'(

tadi kann, I berangan berangan berangan~
I was dreaming about this one guy, entah macam mana, setiap kali pandang muka dia I rasa tenang -.-" yeah, shouldnt feel such way! holy crap! it's too early to fall into love again~we know each other through peers club I joined, semester lepas. and, banyak jugak volunteering work we did together. macam tadi, I helped UKK in handling MDAB programme, I tought I was the only one who came, rupanya dia pun ada jugak :D semangat buat kerja!heheh, jkjk :P ceritanya pasal berangan tu, tetiba angan2 itu di interupt oleh this someone that I deadly want to forget!! all the sweet moment together ws like being rewind. reminising some old good times together pulak! ya Allah, I seriously want to forget him, please ya Allah :'( terus I cuba ingat those bad moment when I was with him, saat menyakinkan hati, benci, gaduh, semua tu. but I ended up crying alone. yes, pitiful me :'(

* I was about to label the post, tapi entah kenapa 'LOVE' really doesnt suit this post :s trying so damn hard to forget!

wishful thinker

bismilahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

hi mr bloggie :') I miss you a lot!
these days are like horrible for me, ah!I dont feel like my soul is here, I somehow lost in every class!
it has been 2 weeks since the first day I started my class, yet, I dont think my mind is filled up with something!
haa, we learnt about critical thinking in BEL 313 class just now, we been tought about the barriers of being critical thinker, and I realize something about myself that stopped me from being critical. that is, I'm a wishful thinker :) (yeah, probably I'm proud of being one :P )
we have to start our speech with "I'm feeling quilty of being ______" okay, since we dont have much time for everyone to share what they are regret of, which is me, included, I would like to somehow share it here :)

I'm feeling quilty of being wishful thinker, I aim so high that whenever I couldn't get what I aimed for, I probably will punish myself. as an example, I used to write on top of my text book "ain AC1105C A+ 4.00 :) " yes, in every of my text book! how I wish I can get it!though I know, with my little effort, it could be impossible!
sometimes, I am a self serving bias too. ingat tak I pernah kiasu sebab na dapatkan fast track? yes, I studied alone!I dont care about other as long as I get what I want during that time, how selfish I'm :'( but then, the luck is not on my side, the programme is terminated, and I , have to continue doing diploma in accountancy. I went to a phsycologist to talk about how dissapointed I'm, after all the hardship I've been through, it's all like useless! tapi, she told me one great words that I will always remember as a guideline in life. I am thankful for the short moment but worth it :')

huh!lagi, please do pray for me :') I want to change myself to be a somebody. a muslim who pactising the true islam's life !

no more you

bismilahirahanirahim and asslamualaikum :')

it has been so long since my last updates
I got a room somewhere in blok K, well, blok paling hujung, terasa ke-senior-an nyaa -____-"

sebenarnya, I'm kinda missing somebody :')

ahh!macam mana nak cakap entah, everytime I think about him, I will pray to Allah, "if he's not meant for me, then keep my heart from remembering him, I'm trying to save my heart to the only one who deserve"

terasa susah sebenarnya :'(

this is my second time :(

andd, I;m not opening my heart for anyone after this!

especially someone with his name.

it kills me. twice. I've had enough.

if I can make a request to Allah, I dont want to ever meet anyone with his name dah lepas nie.
but, one thing you should know, it's never a regret knowing you :') thanx for everything :') betapa I nak buang dia dari hidup I hari tu sampai dia lalu sebelah pun I tak jeling kat dia, acting as if he's invisible though I know he's next to me :'( dear cik ct, tolong lah jaga hati kau tu!may Allah help me :')

erm, lagi, saya rindu maktab, budak2nya, environmentnya, everything! everything in mrsm langkawi!

homecoming - JENGKA

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

it's 2am now, trying to not sleep as I planned to go back to Jengka at 5am today,
well yeah, THIS TIME IS SPARTAA!
hahahahaha!
the result is still ambiguos!we, part 5 students are not given the final said. entah dapat kolej ke tidak lagi sem ni :(
tapii!I dont really care pun if ever I tak dapat bilik, sebab, rumah sewa menanti, I got a great deals too ;)
rm150 including all bills :) fully furnished
and, the transport are always available :D
so, nothing much to worry :)
ehem ehem,
ermm, I've no idea to write dahh -________-
as for this upcoming semester, I dont want to play around. the battle is still on babeh!hahah,
dulu I've once chat with a friend in sri iskandar,
asking about pursuing degree abroad, and, I'm lucky that dia tidak lokek ilmu :)
habis segalanya yang dia tahu dia beritahu!
tapi, there was a time when I feel that the programme is impossible for me. dia cakap, sri iskandar setiap sem pun ada yang 4flat! goshhh!I rasa kerdil sangat :( and, out of a sudden, I feel like the competition is quite tough! semangat I hilang entah kemana :(\
tapi, after having a conversation with a senior from mrsm langkawee, semangat I menaik balik!
I dont care what is going to happen this sem. I just want to ignore those shit and focus on my studies!
he's our role model now, he got anc for his diploma :') kena lawan niii!

I hereby, make a promise to study really hard to ensure the 4flatt! setiap sem pun x pernah dapat :( I want to atleast get a 4flat during diploma, and this is the right time. semester 5. since 5 is my favourite number ;D

doakann sayaaaa ehh???~

operation and izzue islam :(

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

done with le surgery :)
the situation was like this
dr: so how was yr teeth?
me: doesnt show any better
dr: owh, okay, nvm, we'll settle this first then next week we'll arrange another appointment..
me: ermm,
*the doctor pick his scissors and clipper
me: eh KEJAP KEJAP! dr bius dulu KANNN?!
dr: hahah, yea yea, saya bius dlu, dont worry~

haaa!cuak kau!I just close my eyes throughout the operation. dalam hati berulang kali cakap, "cepat la dr nie cakap, okay dah siap!"

after awhile I feel there is something like a thread on my face, cuba bukak mata sedikit, and yes, memang benang!I'm like a piece of fabric where the the doctor is sewing me :(
tapi tak rasaa sakit even a bit!the next appointment is on friday untuk buka balik jahitan, ada empat jahitan kau!na makan pun susa :( asyik terbayang je tengah gigit2, skali tergigit benang tu and tertarik!skali habis robek the whole mouth!whoaa!scary movie kowtt!
okay enough those nightmare :( takk na makan dah sampai jahitan dibuka~ *padahal tadi dah melantak kue tiaw goreng!hahah,,

then, everytime I saw him, my heart was like pumping harder. adakah iniiiii??? -.-" okay berangan! lahai, dia sangat teramat sweeettttttt kowt!!

THISS!

wuargggggghhhhhhhhh! boleh histeria I tahu!

sekali, look at this >

 

hahahah!tak na kau post gambar yang ada bini dia!hahah~foinee,,

take a look at this,

 

haaa, yang ini kecik je!heheh, jeles punya pasal :')

happy married yea abg izzue islam :'( huhu~
*bintak maaf gambar semua google :) hahah,,

sakit mulut

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

hai hoi hey!
hahahah, okay gilaa
erm, I just got back home from kpj ampang puteri, visiting my cousin, accident :(
haila, he's a potential football player! next week he'll represent Malaysia untuk match apatahh, at USM penang. kalau menang, dia pergi UK pulak, ada match apa tahh jugak. (I'm not into football okayy :P) amin cakap, "anak jantan kalau x cium tar, bukan lelaki namanya" *in other word, lelaki wajib accident sekali seumur hidup, owh!macam tu pulak~ tp everyone says tempat tu memang keras sikit! dekat corner heading to WW, dari s/wangsa tu, dah banyak accident kawasan tu, abah cakap, atas bukit tu ada kubur sapa tahh, hahahah!memang bnyk kepercayaan nya iya~
okay, enough about the accident

lusa, I have a dentistry appointment, kena operation :(
do pray for me :)
ahh, bukan bedah beriya pun sebenarnya, takk sampai 5 minit je pun (trying to convince my heart)
ceritanya begini, I pernah tergigit bibir, I tought it was a normal punya tergigit, sekali bengkak kauu!
merata klinik dah pergi, semua cakap, this need an operation!ahhh, memang takk laaa!kau gila!kena operation, ramai doktor berkerumun, dengan nurse lagi, kena tahan ward, dekat hospital, ada bilik mayat!owhh, terima kasih sahaja yea :P I'm not going to the hospital :P nayyyy :P (hahahah!kau ingat ini operation bersalin -.-" yang sampai tido hospital lagi -.-") the last time I went to dentistry, the doctor said, yes, he need to operate that thing, tapi doint worry, sikit je," then I asked, "sakit takk?" (cliche question) "eh no laa, masa bius tu je rasa semut gigit, then you'll feel nothing" ooowwwhhh!deyy, I can bare the pain of semut gigit ;) tapi bukan kerengga la! most of all, mungkin I rasa terpujuk to do the surgery sebab that doctor was soo nice!cakap pun lembut je~ tapi bukan pondan laa~ itu lahh yang I menyampah dekat certain goverment hospital, cakap menyombong! mungkin betul lah people said, private hospital is better than government hospital. mesra alam je!

pasal sakit mulutnya is, I guess this is the reminder from Allah :(
selama ini, I cakap lepas je, my close friends know my style!kalau pergi makan memana, if the taste doesnt suit me, then, I'll directly complaint. yes, mulut tak ada insurance~ I pernah sound macik dm di uitm for the unreasonable price of their food. dah takk pepasal macik tu da aim muka I~ tapi bayangkan laa, my friend took nasi, telur and sayur which cost her rm4!haaa, amek kau, tengah sebuk2 masa lunch time tu I serang macik tu depan orang ramai!!hahaha*devil laugh~ that macik wants to return rm1 to me, tapi I cakap, tak pe la macik, saya x kesah pun seringgit tu, cumanya saya na tanya, kenapa mahal sangat, dia cakap sebab naci banyak, haii, nasi pun rm2, pakai beras apa?mak saya pakai beras basmathi tu pun x semahal tu!banyak kali I ulang tanya pakai beras apa kauu!geram gilaa!

another recent issue, tadi, after visiting my cousin, we hadour dinner at a restaurant. masa na bayar tu, ada chinese memotong que. haihh, memang kenaa la~ selamba je dia tahu, yang I pulak, x memandang dah boyfie dia kat belakang I, kalau dah na kena pompuan nie mmg peduli la kau bawak bodyguard ke polis ke hatta ketua samseng sekali pun! because I'm at the right side, right?hahah~

ada sekali tu tengah2 shopping, berselisih dengan ada malay girl yang memakai pakaian tidak cukup kain, I dare to say she's poor, kalau kaya, mesti banyak duit na beli kain menutup badan kann?heheh,, dengan selambanya, I said to my sister "adik kalau na beli baju make sure kain dia cukup tau" pernah jugak I said, "kaklong rasa nak bukak je tudung kaklong nie sedekah dekat prempuan yang x cukup kain tu" yes, I cakap depan2 orang tu. cakap belakang tak baik kann?hee :P

jadi, I guess, sakit mulut yang takk baik2 ni sebab laser sangatt kowt O.o kena buatan orang ke? hailaa!nauzubillah!

kekedutan atau kekedekutan?

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

it has been awhile since my last updates, well, it's holiday dude!
I dont have much time to spend here, updating some crap :P
*okay, kalau dekat uitm I have alot of time to waste,heheh :P

okay, my post today is about my habit which is, I dont like to spend money,
the title should be kekedekutan, but, when you pronounce it quicker, it sounds like "kekedutan"

okay, enough about the title,

erm, since I;m so eager to start my new semester on 10th may, I've listed some things for the preparation, ceritanya, lagi about 3 months, I'll be going 20th, so no more 'teen' years. jadi, I bercita2 lah kononnya want to lose some weight. kononnya lahh kann -___-
so, I've made a schedule that MUST be followed in order to reach the target!
I think this is most suitable meals for me,

breakfast : anlene + oat + raisin + dates (okay, breakfast is the most important meal before I start my day!harapnya I dont skip the breakfast *actualy I never skip a glass of milk before going to class pun :) cuma kali ini, it has oat added, nak kuruskan :P )
lunch : no need! I want to spend time for a nap. well, someone told me, a nap in the afternoon gives you energy to do some works at evening sebenarnya, no lunch means save moneys :P *see? kedekutan pertama -.-"
dinner : any masakan yang macik dm tu da masak, ambil 1 senduk sahaja! make sure the price dont exceed rm1! fried rice is much prefered, because we're malaysian, cant be saperated from our ruji. lagi 1, ianya mengenyangkan :)
supper : okay, as for this, people said, a cup of hot chocolate boleh membantu membuatkan mata mengantuk, jadi, in order to sleep tight, milo + anlene + oat will do :) oat tu kira memang kena makan pagi and malam, WAJIB. so, milo to replace chocolate, anlene for bones while aot for not feeling starving! heheh,,
okay, itu dari segi makanan. done.
*owh okay, lupa! the reward. you can go to pasar rabu to spend utmost rm5 there :) pasar sabtu tak boleh sebab ada transportation charge lagi!hehe..

sebenarnya kann,
I've calculated the budget for the fifth semester, and I have about 1.4k left after deducting the fees, and other expenses. tapi tak tolak duit buku and top up lagi laa. so let say, that will cost me the balance 400. so, I think, I want to save 300 into my RHB sebab entahla kenapa, I tak boleh tengok any of my account yang balance dia zero -.-" tapi actually, I have another acount yang balance dia zero jugak which is maybank, tapi, if I want to keep the money in maybank, I have to atleast save 500 there. kalau tak nanti balance dia takk cantik -___- yes. number plays the biggest role in my life -.-" mak cakap "kaklong nie kalau nanti gaji dia rm8033, yang rm33 tu je boleh buat belanja, kalau keluar lebih2 nanti nombor dye x cantik dalam bank tu" yes, indeed mom -_____-" even now, i've seen the tanda-tanda :O huhu,,jadinya, I dont know how to divide the money equally so that semua account I mendapat kasih sayang yang sama rata -.-" harharhar~

owh yes, I planned to buy a crocs before balek kampus ni, tapi, tak jadi kowt. sebab sayang na keluarkan duit yang dah cantik nombornya dlm akaun tu -.-"
I figured out something about me now, I jenis yang akan kumpul duit to buy something, but in the end, bila duit tu dah cukup, I rasa sayang na spend the money which ended up just keep the money rather than buying the things which the money been collected for. sadis kan hidup -_______-
susahnya lah jadi orang yang kedekut -.-"
I pernah merayau 1 KL masa bulan puasa semata-mata na compare harga sehelai tudung yang mana offers the lowest price with the same quality. last2 nya, tak jadi beli jugak sebab harga tudung tu rm25, tp akak tu bg less to rm18, tapi I mintak rm15, kalau x, I dont want to buy. mmg takk la harga tudung 25, na bg 15 kann?hahahah!last2nya x beli jugak. hari tu, I went to jalan TAR lagi, going to the same shop. harga tudung tu was actually 20! tapi that akak bagi less to 18, owhh!so, my advice is, janganlah buat preparation raya masa ramadhan. all the price will be marked up gilaa la!

jadi, itulah kisahnya kekedekutan saya -_____-

nazar yang memakan diri

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

I'm in bigg trouble !
okay, the truth is,me myself who dig my own grave on the first place -_____-"

okay, in islam, we have a sort of promise, so-called nazar. which means, a promise to Allah,
once He had grant your wish, then you have to fulfil your promise towards Him,
okay, what is it called 'nazar yang memakan diri', is that, I mati-mati tak percaya I will get it, so, I made a nazar, sebab, I'm tired, tired of getting the same result no matter how much my effort was. terukkannn :(
begini,
I was definitely sure that, I will never get an A for my account paper,
sebab, I had once get high carrymarks, but in the end, the result wont make any different.
still, I got B for my account paper. so, I was like giving up -_-"

when I was in first semester,I got the lowest carrymark for that subject. praise to Allah ! it doesnt make me weak :) alhamdulillah,miracle happen. I manage to get A- in the end. masa tu terkejut gilaa! I must have gotten fullmark for my finals ! hehe..

when I was in second semester, I got a high carrymarks, but, pathetically, the final paper wasnt that easy for me. mungkin sebab I was too confident that I will get an A for my final, sebab dulu carrymark pun the lowest, still boleh dapat A, apatah lagi kalau carrymark tinggi kann? the paranoia me~ sekali takk :'( the same thing goes when I was in 3rd semester, I like the subject, I'm energatic, confident and positive. sebab I want to pursue fast track. tapi, walau sekuat mana I usaha, seems like account isnt for me :'( I got B+ for that subject.

hence, so, jadi, I was like giving up. dengan riak takbur sombongnya, I bernazar, if ever I got an A, alteast A- lahh let say kann, I will treat anybody who involves in the making of 'that A' . sebab, I was pretty sure I will definitely never get A ! never !

sekali, the reveal day comes! (dah macam clean house da -.-) okayy, I opened up my email, and., here we go :) I got A- for my account paper!yeayyy nayyy -.-" told someone about the result, and got back the reminder, how about yr nazar cik ct? -.-" okay okay, how am I suppose to do meyh :(

okayy, lets just fulfil it right :)

cumaa, erm, I dont know how -_____- sebab, ramaiii kowttt!hahah~

okayy,lagi mory nyaa,
I used to get closed with somebody, a guy obviously.
and, everything seems so easy that time, cuma, there was a mistake that I would never expect it to be this serious until we became a stranger to each other.
as time flies, our life goes on, pretending that it wont give any impact to my life. despite how much I still want the old him. I heard he's now a succeeded man :) alhamdullilah, you get your life back when we were apart. and I, declining the stairs of victory, it seems like, you dont need me to succeed, but I do. kann? lame me talking nonsense :') entah macam mana, tiba-tiba, we get back together, and, during that time, I was about to leave. seeing your achievements make me envy you the most. and, it's better for me to leave. I tried so much to create the most meaningful memory during my last time being there. so, when I leave, I have something to reminisce for. I think that, the best solution for us is, to be far apart from each other.. and, for me, I believe, there is something huge waiting for me out there. okayy cukup. and guess what, as we be friend again, he lost focus. and I think, I'm the factor :/ we should never be together I guess :/ despite how much I still need you as my friend because, I see me inside you~ cuma, I dont want you to keep failing :/ *******

there is only 1 mission

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

ehem ehem,
if I have an opportunity to ask anything I want, and , for sure, I'll be granted for it,
I really, really want to go somewhere in US or aussie to do my bachelor,

and, IF I have to sacrifice anything of my belonging, I will definately let go of it.
seriously!
yes, I'm willing to sacrifice anything to get what I want,
and, it's proven. based on my experiance back when I was young.
I pernah lepaskan jawatan, pangkat, kedudukan,enjoyness ( such a typical dramatic budak ni~ )
but, it's serious.
dulu, I was eager to go to boarding school. infact, I've already got everything in my previous school which is SMART. I'm pengawas koperasi, dealing with money, holding a possition, liked by teachers, one of the best student(kononlahh kan), best friendss, active in kawad, that teacher susan want me to hold an important position jugak la dalam organizational chart of BSMM. secured life.  kalau na difikirkan, what else do I look for, right? I have everything.
tapi, I left those, for the thing that I really want, which is to go to a boarding school. taking risk !
yes, I know, what if, I cant survive there, people said that hostel life is tough. dah la langkawee tu jaoh ! but,since I eager to further my studies there, I kuatkan semangat. for me, there is no point of return once I step into my mission. if I want something, I definately will go for it. nothing can stop me !

sampailah sekarang,
abah pernah offered me to take a driving class, but I resist. since I'm not intrested in driving.
entah, macam malas, I rather take a public transport to go anywhere around KL.
gadget gadget gadget.
I'm not interested in any of it.
let it be, samsung, nokia, BB, apple, macbook or whatsoever sophisticated gadget, it wont buy me :P
I just wanna further my studies abroad :') pleaseee~

*honestly, I'm writing this because I get sicked when people always ask me why am I still using the old+lame+not-so-wow stuff as if I ni sengkek sangat x berduit na beli. and, yes, I muak dengan orang yang asyik dengan material, sampai lupa dia tu menghabiskan harta mak ayah. I can see that most of my friend in Jengka are that type, looking someone elses wealth, kaya, porpular, adik retis, itu yang dipandang tinggi. iyanya memualkan! sampailah satu ketika, I pernah SENGAJA menyepahkan slip baki akaun lepas withdraw duit tu atas meja to show to my roomates that I'm not that papa kedana x mampu na beli those good phones. jadi selepas ini, sila jangan bertanya kenapa ain tidak menukar handphone or lappy, or camera, or apa-apa sahaja.

 s.e.k.i.a.n.

He always have something :')

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamalaikum :)

alhamdullilah, thank you Allah !
thank you sangat sangat :')

yes, maybe Allah dont grant you something that you really hopes for, but, in return, He gives you something else :)

I dah macam na sujud syukur, and text all the lectures that had contribute all their effort to teach me regardless it's 1.39am!
and, suddenly I stopped, kalau iyaa pun gembira, jangan la na menggangu masa tidur orang kann, hehe,,

ya Allah, okay, nazar is still gonna be nazar,
I promised to Allah to donate any book that I got an A for that subject,
but, suddenly I feel so happy, that I want to simply give all the books to my junior !
ahh, I dont feel sleepy now :')
I'm just too happy,
may this success comes with bless from Allah :')

owh, yes, not to forget, all 'le classmates yang dah bersusah payah mengajar budak yang susah nak diajar ni :')
without those stressness, hard life that making me even tough than before, I truly wont come to this stage,(ahh, macam lah dah secure the most precious victory kann -.-") tapi, thanx sesangat !
to lectures, cikgu, mentor, mantee, study groupmates, classmates, senior, junior, PEERS of course!
but, most of all, thank you to mak and abah for praying the best for me :)
ahh :'( what else should I ask . having all these is just too much for me :')
thank you Allah :')
thank you sangat2 :')

newsss

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

general election is over :)
tapi, as usual, there will be the smartest political analysts who wants to give out their opinion,
ahh, manusia, mana pernah berhenti mengata, well, we cant make everyone satisfy :)

tapi lah kann, seriously, if someone ask me which party will I vote, I'll definately have no idea,
kalau BN, they have bangla nation who will vote for them, if PR, they only have us, the malaysian to vote for them, so, I rasa, I akan give my vote to PR,
tapi, to look back to what BN have done in harmonizing the country,stability, all the malays reserve sebagai, I think I should vote for BN, ahh, entah laa, as for my place in Taman Keramat, they said, Shaari sugib is a good person, so as Azmin, my mum said, they both always come to our surau. and, if they do, they would never talk about politics, like berkempen dalam surau tu ke apa. respect~

ehem ehem,
so, as for today,actually, I've got 2 news,
I dont know if it is a good news orrr badd news.
BN will govern the country,
andd,
the second news,
MUET result has released :(
and, it's always sipi2 for me,
always~
*ahh kau takk bersyukur!

what ever it is, still, I dont want to repeat it :)
kalau recheck tu, ermm,M.A.Y.B.E,, KOWT, idk~

ehem ehem, so I, hereby, would like to congratulate myself for achieving a good result than before :'D seriously, to think of it, the questions are deadly hardest than any of the question in the world (bajet hiperbola) tapi, I manage to improve my marks, eventhough it doesnt pass the border :')
paling bangga, my speaking test :) menaik half! nasib tak dapat 46 out of 45 -.-"

so, the next awaiting result, is, tomorrow,
I'm going to send my sister for her interview.
how I jealous much of her, muda-muda lagi dah ada experiance being interviewed,
where me, only the mock interview back in mrsm langkawee dulu,hurmm..

then, the upcoming result lagi, is on 9th may :s
*na taip tarikh tu pun berdebar jantung rasa -.-"
ya Allah, I hope to hear a good news on this day,
walaupun after I made my own presumption, macam takk nampak bayang2,
blackout~ ahahah!

this is my second time :'(

bismillahirahmanirahim and asslamualaikum :)

yaAllah :'(
it feels like I'm the biggest loserr ever,
the moment when you know that, you've tried harder, but the result will still be the same,
am I not trying harder ?
ya Allah,
to be truth, I feel like giving up :'(

dia macam rasa na hentak kepala kat dinding berkali2 sampai pecah and cry all day long, reminising the old good days when everything will be at my side, yaAllah, betapa tidak bersyukurnya aku dahulu :'(

*sampai label pun x tahu na letak apa, betapa depress nya :'(

MJSC GAGS

bissmilahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)
ya Allah :')
I dont know why, the tear foes down everytime I scrolled MJSC's gag comics :')

yes, semua memang betull sangat2,

you should click here and scroll to read the comics ,and re-read, and re-read :')
all those memories are so true, and I, somehow miss it damn much :')

"bomoh-bomohkan"

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

the moment when you dont know what you want
-______________________________-"
then, seek guidance from Allah :')

hurm, sekarang nie kann,
I read a novel, again~
walaupun not-so-me
the boredeness is killing me though~
hurmm,
the sentences in the novel really, really remind me of somebody,
ahh!I should stick with my egotism :S
despite how much I really want to text you, hurmm,
I just wonder, is it possible dia dah "bomoh2" kan ain ?
ahh, typical me -.-"
tapi, iya lahh kn, my friend who introduce him to me cakap,
he's so-called-ustaz la konon,
so the probability he would "bomoh2kan" tu ada -.-"
hurmm,
I shouldn't feel this when I've actually rejected him :S
lagi pun, he dont know my fullname, macam mana dye na "bomoh2kan"
kann?

hurmm, idk,
sometimes, I pray to Allah, I want this, like, I really, really want it,
tapi, at the moment, I ask myself, why should I have it?
I pun tak faham, I keep on praying to have something, tapi, I pun tak tahu sebenarnya kenapa I perlukan itu semua, hurmm~

*owh, well, word "bomoh2kan" is actually praying to Allah to closer our heart

saya takk jeles -.-"

bismillahiramanirahim and assalamualaikum :')

ahh!I feel like crying :')
tears of happiness :')
nahh, have a look at this
dan, tetibe, entah mengapa, entah dari mana,
I teringin na kawin sekarang jugak -.-"

ahh!focus cik ct, kau na fly kann ?
hurmm,
may their mariage be blessed by Allah :')

faham tak mereka muda setahun dari I ?!
owh, I jelly much to this sistah ^^"
arghh, jeles tengok gambar mereka faham takk -.-"
everything you guys did are not haram,
malah, dapat pahala lagi,
not to compare to those couple out there yang making sins everytime they're dating (sorry to say)
and, bersentuhan, apatah lagi kann,

"menyentuh perempuan yang haram bagimu adalah lebih teruk dari menyentuh kulit babi"

owh, I dont remember which hadith said this, or perhaps, ayat quran,
hurmm, shame on me AGAIN, I know the details, but not the resources :(
owh, back to that well-said,
kiranya, if you touch a piq pun dah kena samak, kalau sentuh bukan mahram ?
perhaps, kena siat2 kulit tu kowt o.O baru suci balek,
just a thoughts :)

sebenarnya kann, I'm kinda missing him :'(
owh hati, kau jangan na gedik sangat boleh ?

cooking isn't that hard :)

bismillahirahmanirahim and asslamualaikum :)

okay, I found this picture on facebook,
hahah, lawak,
it's always been like this when I'm in the kitchen -.-"
tak tak, basically when frying something, especially fish!
not only that,
I have my own sheild kalau na tumbuk cili dalam mortar,
takut kalau biji cili tu terpelanting dalam mata :D
hahah, it's kinda funny to have that such sheild when cooking,
but who cares right? as long I've cook the most delicious dish in the world!ahah,,

owh yes, to think of it, I dont really pro in cooking, I only cook things that I like to eat,
and usualy, I have a, erm, boleh la dikatakan, bajet western kann, erm, I'm more into western food la,
tapi, as you know, western food are like bit expensive kalau na mentekedarah hari2,
so, I've made up a decision, that is to learn how to bake it ;)
lagi worth it la jugak,
sebab, I can choose halal ingredient of course :)
you can't be very sure of their halal-ness when you're eating food which originally from europe right?
so, that's why I love to bake dish that I like to eat :)
sekarang nie, I'm craving for blueberry cheese cake at SR, tapi, since I've knew how to bake it, rasa rugi lah if I go to SR, and pay more than rm7, just for a slice of it :(

eh, kadang2 kan, bila kita masak, and serve the dish to people, kita akan rasa gembira and, kenyang. x makan pun lagi, tapi dah rasa kenyang, seeing those happy faces eating pun dah buatkan kita rasa kenyang tauu :)

ah yes, this is a wise advise from my master chef,
"makanan tu kita yang masak dia, bukan dia yang masak kita,
so, buat la macam mana pun as we desire, as long as it tastes better-(mak,2008)
jadi, to those who thinks cooking is complicated, back to this principle :)

nahh! mengiurkan gilaa kan :P

someday :')

bismillahiramanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

I feel sooo baddddd :(
kononnya mahu berubah, solat awal waktu, tak mahu tidur siang, tapiiiii :'(
ahh!shameless me talking shit :'(
it's already 0130, I'm not sleepy yet,
mana tak nya subuh gajah (talk to myself -___- )
hurmm,
I read a novel today, yes, basically, not so me lah kan, layan novel :O
tapi I like farihah iskandar's writing
dear yayah series :)
owh yes, hlovet the new series is already released !
gotta move my ass to MPH real soon,
once my pocket filled up lahh kan -___-"

and, that eager feeling to further study in overseas burst again :(
how I wish I have the experiance studying abroad :')
hurmm,
everytime I tell him the wish, he would always said, "someday cik ct, somedayy"
deyy, I wish I know when is it the 'someday'
ya Allah, betapa aku ni lemah sangat iman, I always questioning your qada' and qadar :'( shameless me :(

maybe this will do :')

 

semalam, I chat with abang, though he just wanna make me jelly of his new tab, bought in UK lahh kan, abang, that kinda gadget wont make me jelly lahh :P
he said, he wants to visit italy during summer break, hurmm :'(
itu pun I tak jeles jugak, what makes me jealous the most is,
I still cant accept the fact that he's already in UK :'(
while noob me, still in Malaysia tanah tumpahnya darahku,
you got me already abang! hurmm, no need to impres me with your new gadget or what so ever new things you buy just to make me jealous :'(

ya Allah, make me strong enough to bear the test ya Allah,
though I know, "apa yang baik padaku mungkin tidak baik bagi Allah"
ahh!I lupa ayat quran mana yang cakap ayat nie :'(
I have to be patient :')

anak di hutan disusukan, kera di rumah mati kelaparan

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

hi everybodyyyy :D
I'm kinda bored here,
x dapat kerja lagi,
jadinya, I plan to do some revision for my account :O
ahah! weirdo cik ct -.-"

tak tak, I've just finished unpack all the things from my luggage,
yes, it's already thursday, dah almost a week in KL, I pemalas yea,hahah!
next agenda is going to celcom center to temporarily terminate bb line, sebab, I'm not gonna use it at home, rugi je la bayar kan, sadly, duit tambang lrt pun i xde sekarang ! betapa pokainya -.-"
abah cakap, he's not gonna send me there because, jalan na pergi sana sesak,dia malas!
faham tak he rather pay monthly bill dari hantar I pergi sana to terminate the line ? huhh~
nvm abah, I'll go by myself!huhhh~ dari abah bayar kat celcom tu, baik abah bagi duit tu kak kaklong,,hurmm..I wish he could read this~

next list-to-do is,
MOVIE MARATHON :D
what a life should be :)

and, out of a sudden,
teringat kat result yang bakal keluar :S
hurmm,
terus lost mood :(

till then~

OH politics~

bismilahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

whoa!PRU 13 is just around the corner !
me?
lalang~
I'm not qualify to vote, YET
well, if I have the right to vote pun, I dont have any idea which party to choose,
too much liar lately,
I dont know which one to believe in :s
so, I would like to share some of my thought

first, their manifesto to lower the price of cars
dearest people, from what I've learnt in economics,
it is definately not a good idea to make the cars as cheap as you desire.
buat kereta jadi harga mampu milik by every people ?
nahh, japan is well-known developed country, yet, 70% of its population ride a bicycle O.o
still maju kann?
cars doesnt determine ones wealth :)
price of  imported cars is way too expensive ?
hahahah! it's the stratergy of our government to protect our brand lahh! proton and produa are still affordable right ?
pilihlah produk malaysia ;) heheh,,

on second thought, I still in doubt whether BN manage to win O.o
they are gambling newbies in politics,,
takut, rakyat dont really believe in the credibility to lead the nation,
on the good side pulak, newbies have lotsss of new idea in developing the country :)
bagus jugak tu,,
tapikan, I'm afraid those veteran leader cant accept the decision, thus, join the opposition.
dude, if you cant be a good leader, then, be a loyal follower. bukan na criticise, tapi na give opinion,
jangan pentingkan jawatan, think of what you can contribute to our nation, the responsibility !
orang atasan tahu lebih yea,,

lagi,
ahh, banyak sebenarnya na bebel, tapi dah lupa pulak -.-"
till then~

I'm not ready YET

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :D
ahh, what a real freedom !
abah tegur, I'm like owl, awake at night but sleep in the day,heheh, used too abah -.-"

gotta change that !
okay2,

I planned to find a job :)
saja na gain more experiance,
well, working teaches me the things I cant find in class,
it's about live,
kalau dulu, I like to condemn people, judge them, slacking of course,
tapi, since I worked as cashier at AEON, I learnt to be more polite, be nice to people, eventhough I dont know them,
and, alhamdullilah, I've changed ever since :)
so, tadi I went to AEON again, to fill in the application form, hope to get the reply as soon as possible. tak larat dah na makan tidur makan tidur kat rumah nie -.-"
in other word, I manage to avoid eating all the time, boleh kurus maybe :| kononlahh kann,

pastu, na mory nie,
regarding this post , hurmm :(
I just dont know why am I keep thinking of him :'(
ya Allah, I really really really truly wanna forget him :'(
but out of a sudden, he came across my mind ! (I wonder if he feel the same -.-")
the moment when he said the 3 magical word struck my mind -.-"
how can I forget you when you had create so much memory that cant be forgotten :(
how I wish I never know you, must be lil bit easier for me to focus on my studies though, kononlah kann,,
ya Allah, if he's the one, show us the right way by not commiting sins, I want a blessed marriage :'D heheh,,
dah kenapa fikir pasal kawin pulak -______-"
need to stay FOCUS !
owh, by the way, I've packed things to bring to jengka for next sem !
semangattttt kan :D
tak sabar to really start the new life, and act like a real student ! I mean, how exactly student should live. saya mahu mengondol 4 flat sem depan ! kononlahh kan, hey!pray for me though! heheh,,

ending of SEM 4 :(

bismilahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

and I hereby, proudly announce that,
SEM BREAK STARTS NOWWWW :D
ahh, finally, I can get rid of these crapiness, bulshitness, and all the negativity.
rasa na menangiss :'(

ahh, okay, I finally homie :D
goooddddd to be home !

okay, na cerita nie,
on thursday, the day before account paper,
we studied together,
I feel bad for not helping fatin though, she ask me to teach her account, but, I put so many excuse, that she might think, I dont want to help her, but, truly, I'm not..
I seriously love to teach my friend, helping them in academic, but there will be so much rules they have to follow, such as, I dont want to study with people that I'm not used to. tapi dia, she wanted to invite ida, it's not that I'm not used to ida, cuma, I cant study with someone I cant be with. owh, sila la faham -.-" well, if you want to study, surely u have someone you comfortable with kan? so do I :)
and I cant study with ida.
okayy,
on thursday, me, ilaa and bella, studied together. while mat and faizul havent arrived yet, they have MAF in the morning and will be joining us in the afternoon..
ceritanya begini,
I ask bella to teach me cashflow, but she said, she dont really master in that topic, so, we make up a decision that is to invite the bigg boss to guide us :)
I called madam if she is available during that time to guide us in answering the question.
alhamdullilah, madam free :)
she's willing to come to the library and meet us :)
pastu, sedihnyaa,
my classmate, I mean the girls,
are like, being x puas hati, sebab, I didnt invite them along when madam comes to our discussion room,walhal, they are in the same library too.
girl, it's not that I dont want to invite you, cant you see that the room is too 'big' to have all of you in the same time ?
bilik tu masuk 4 orang pun dah penuh !
ada yang cakap, I penting kan diri sendiri,na pandai sorang2 :'(
manaa adaaaa :'''''( well, if you want to know, I invite madam to come is not a plan, I call her by chance!
and, as if I really selfish, I tak buat kelas tambahan on friday tu tahu :'(
I yang minta madam buat kelas tambahan on friday tu, so that, korunk semua boleh tanya any kecelaruan before sit for the exam.
bukan madam yang tanya i whether kita na buat kelas atau tidak, I yang mintaa :'( i na kita semua jumpa madam for the last time before sit for the paper. get the bless from her, apologizing for any mistakes semua bagai. I try to be a good leader though :'( I'm not neglecting you guys pun :'(
if, I nie selfish, I x buat kelas tambahan tu tahu, I pergi je sorang2 kat bilik madam, belajar dengan madam, ambik semua tips before exam from her, and x spread to all of you :'( tapi, tidak, I buat kelas tambahan tu, I ajak semua datang, maybe madam have tips in answering the question ke kann,,
I tried to be a good leader :') tapi, apa yang I buat, orang salah erti kann :'( as if I selfish, I tak pergi turun naik HEA just to book the class on friday. I book je bilik kat library tu, senang. after the class, I can continue study in the library. tapi takk, I pergi HEA, tanya orang tu if there's any class is free at blok J during 10-12 on friday. sebab apa? sebab I tak na korunk semua jalan jauh dari hostel! blok J paling dekat I guess. padahal HEA tu cakap, blok IST banyak kosong. but i insist to get a class at block J jugak. I x buat kat library sebab, perempuan have to wear baju kurung. I dont want to bother you guys to wear baju kurung when it's just an extra class. I tried to be a good leader though :'(
well, since PRU13 is just around the corner, I'd like to speak about leadership.
It's hard to be a leader actually :(
kalau kau fikir pasal pangkat dan kedudukan, senang.
tapi,
kalau kau fikir pasal tanggungjawab, nescaya kau tak akan sanggup jadi ketua sebenarnya :'(
dalam quran pun dah cakap, seorang ketua nie, sebelah kaki dia dah masuk neraka, kalau dia tidak adil, maka terheretlah sebelah lagi kaki dia ke dalam neraka :'(
and,I try not to be one :'( tapi, since I dah ter jadi, I try to be fair to all :| still, people x puas hati dengan I :'( sedih tahuu :'( dengan klazmate boycott i, roomate pun sama, it's not a good ending of sem 4 actually :'(
cant wait to enter sem 5. new roomates. new spirit. new everything.
I'll be with EC's student next sem :)
trying to be far away from account student. I need to be alone. yes, for the entire sem. isolation suit me the most :') and, I like to be isolated from the people that I know :') sebab, I tak suka apa yang i buat orang lain tahu. I dont like to be in the center. biarlah I yang mengundur diri :'( ahh!buat cerita sedih! tapi, it's true what! pointer I okay when I dont stay with account student. sebab mereka tak kesah apa yang I buat. ini, kalau dengan student account, I bukak buku sikit, mula lah na perli, "ain study" menyampah! weyh, I'm not coming to UiTM to find a husband lahh, I datang uitm sebab na belajar -.-"
atas dasar kesedihan, I went to my senior's room. overnight at her room. tapi dia keluar,hang out with her friend, so, her room is mine ! I like the environment :) silent. away from people. blessed.
trying to forget all the sadness being rejected by my own friends :'(
kamis malam tu, as usual, me and ilaa went to the library. then, mat and faizul came. with shahmi and zarif! masa they enter the room, me and ilaa was like unnerved. weird. x pernah2 seumur hidup i bercakap dengan shahmi and zarif tahu ! that night we studied together! ahh, pengalaman yang sangat aneh sem ini.
pastu, library tutup ( I wish library tu tak tutup sepanjang week exam) so, we went back hostel.
balek2 je, ida terus keluar bilik, ajak tiqah study sama at Ty's room. masa tu, I dont mind, sebab, I tak tahu lagi ida terasa dengan i sebab i tak ajak dia study sama when madam datang libary petang tadi. eyan pun keluar bilik, pergi study di bilik jiran. me, alone in the room. suka. i turn the fan to speed 5, open the window, shut the door, sejuk ! angin luar menyelinap masuk ke dalam bilik (ahh, typical ayat novel) tetiba amy datang, crying like a baby, she said, no one want to help her in account. everybody is like condemning her for not knowing the simplest rule in account. masa tu, I tengah study FRS pulak -.-" ahh, suit time betul la kann, tapi, xpe. selagi I boleh tolong, I tolong yea. so I let her know everything that I know regarding published account :) though I'm not that good in that topic -.-" carrymark pun macam hape je ! pastu, she told me about all the classmate is like avoiding me sebab case x ajak mereka study sama tu lahh! :'( glad to speak to someone. atleast there is someone who know the real situation of me :') yes, someone. cukuplah satu :')

how I wish they know the real story too. tapi xpe laa, I malas, I just want to focus in this last paper which is account. I really hope that I can do the best! tak sabar na habezkan paper akaun and go back to KL. forget everything in jengka. I told amy, since amy is my ex-romate when I was in part 3, amy pernah nampak I jual kupon I, which she tought I dah tak mahu duduk kolej lagi sem4 or I mohon fast track, yes, indeed amy, I memang mohon fast track. sebab tu I have the gut to sell some of my coupon.. glad that I'm not selling them all, sekali fast track xde :| I tell her why I apply the programme is that, I bosan dengan typical people in jengka. I love the enviroment, but not the people. and that makes us cry together. dia dengan masalah dia, I dengan kekecewaan I :'(
sedih kan hidup I sem 4 nie?

dah lah I lose hope gilaa in academic, people surrounding me pulak being like soo not supportive when actually I need them the most :'( sem nie I banyak kol ezaa. I feel like she's the only one who understand me. and, if you scroll to all my entry this sem, banyak yang I write about sadness :( I sesungguhnya tak bahagia sepanjang sem ini :'(
SEMUA SALAH UITM!hahah~ I'm not gonna blame myself for not living my life to the fullest :p
jadi, now, I'm KLian :DDDDD
I want to look for a job :)
insyaAllah :)
cuti ini na relax, kuruskan badan mungkin, cari kerja itu pasti. nampak x berbezaannya?heheh :P
so, till then :)

I TEACH MY FRIEND ACCOUNT ! sila percaya -.-"

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

okay, I still remember when I told pn Wani how dissapoint I'm knowing the abolishment of fast track programme, she said, "mungkin ada perjuangan yang belum selesai, ada yang ain x lepas memberi lagi kat uitm ni" okay, puan :)

yes, indeed, maybe I'm excellent in academic, but, I give less, I didnt help my friend much, I can be considered as, "na berjaya sorang2" I know I'm badd :(

so, this semester,
alhamdullilah, we study together, we help each other in academic, that's what suppose to be right?

and, as for me, the most weirdo things is, I TEACH MY FRIEND ACCOUNT !

*glup*

surely gonna be more to ajaran sesat when I start teaching, especially ACCOUNT -.-"
I usually been tought by others on account based on previous semester's experiance,
but this time around, I'm the teacher, no longer the student -_____-"
and, what you expect when a maths student teaching account?
*hihihihi*gelak jahat~
yes, I create formula to make the statementsss easier :D
my 'student' will know what is a-c2 in finding retained profit and Capital reserve redemption figure,
and, there's alot of other formula tahu :P
then, I dont open T-a/c to find the balancing figure, I create my own formula, which is SOCI+b/d-c/d
okay, those formula is understood by me and my 'student'
there's a situation when mat ask me about the transaction, debit, credit

mat: ain, additional info num 2, kita dr sales, cr debtor and dr cogs, cr inventory ?
and me, making the most blurry face in the world, trying to understand what the heck is dr cr about -.-"
faizul: kau jangan tanya dr cr mat! kan dye ckp dye x tahu dr or cr,
ain: huh!memahami punn,pffftttt~
mat: okay2, kita tambah kat sales, tolak debtor bla bla bla
ain: owhh, yes, betul2,

see? I can understand more when they convert the question to maths language,
yes, maths language yea, not account language -______-"

then, just now, I dont know how to find the net profit before tax when the question gives you the final figure, so I have to work backward, and, I ended up, generating formula, x - bla bla + bla bla = 7600
so find x,
faham takkk betapa wasting time nyaa -___-"
then ila said, ain, if the operation's minus, we add, vice versa..
ain: owh, thanxx ilaaa -.-" otherwise I would bring all the figure into a maths version -__-

huh, inilah akibatnya bila budak maths mengajar account -.-"

so tommorrow is the last day to spend with all the study group account, sebab, my mum cakap, I should spend time on my own to revise alone, because I told my mum that, semalam, I dont have time to study acocunt since they are like asking me non stop, lepas seorang seorang bertanya. so here it is, jumaat I'm gonna spend time to just really focus on me myself :)
ahh, konon hebat akaun sangat sampai jadi kaunter pertanyaan -.-" pffttt~

broken hearted girl :')

bsmilahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

I dont know why am I keep posting in this blog
stress I guess :|
well, I'm ready to be broken hearted girl :')
ahh!cliche~
dah, I've had enough
enough of all your fools
yes, indeed, I feel stronger when I'm with you, but,
deep inside, Im asking myself, how long can it be?
I even get jealous when you're with someone else.
yes, I know, you're not even mine,
and, that's why, I do feel like, I have to step back
before I madly in love with you :)
thank you for all your good deed towards me all these while
I'm keeping it in my own memory which I hope, someday, I'll hit the rock and all of it will banish :')
ahh! I dont know why, just give me a reason by P!nk really suit my feeling now :(
nahh, the intro part,

"right from the start you're a thief
you stole my heart,
and I, your willing victim"

andd,

"just give a reason,
just a little bit enough,
just a second
we're not broken
just bent,
till we can learn to love again :'(

andd,

sorry I dont understand,
where're all is this coming from,
I thought, that we're fine"

yes, I thought that we're fine :')
I thought :')
ahh!
how I wish it didnt start in the first place
how I wish I can really hate you when we're fighting, that we'll never get back together
how I wish I can persuade my heart not to even care about you
how I wish that you'll get outta my mind right now!
ahh!
I'm weak to encounter the feeling,
dear cik ct, he's not the one!you hate him right?
but, how the heck is my heart still insist to be with him ?
you stubborn cik ct!

arrow

never, never, never give up !

this picture inspire me to keep striving, regardless how painful it is :')

religion: Rasullulah era or now is better?

bismilahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

I get tired
yes,
tired of arguing thing that are useless to debate on!
i dont usually give up when I have point okay,
but, if I did so, it means that, I cant bare to see you crying like a baby !
if you ever ask my friends,(friend who know me well)
I always have something to turn you down, especially in arguing things.
sebab, for me, it is easy. if you're right, then, we're not into a debate session, cause I simply will vote for you dear, tapi if you're wrong, and the worst is trying to standstil with your point, then, you're a dead meattt!
trust me.
I'm not the type of person who can easily give up okayy,,

what's your view if someone said,
"kan bagus kalau lahir zaman rasullulah"
yes, I have that kind of thought before,
it's gonna be fantastic right?
you have someone who really close to you who can guide you all the way,
have the person who have the answer of all your silly question,
have someone who can you always refer to.
have the role model who you can follow to.
tapiiii,
are you sure you're gonna live in bless, be the one who is selected by Allah to get the hidayah.
look, if you're in that era, your religion is most probably, agama nenek moyang, christian, or jewish.
the religion that you've been followed since your nenek moyang. it's harder for you to simply change your religion when Rasullulah came and introduce you to islam right?
the point is, are you that sure that, you will be the selected person by Allah to join islam?
even now, you're born in Islam pun still not practising the way of life as Muslim,(reminder to myself as well) and, you're hoping that you wanna born in zaman Rasullulah SAW ?
dear, please be a greatful servant.
Allah knows what's the best for us though :)
*please correct me if I'm wrong :) well, that's just my opinion :)

hurmm, basically, that's what we're arguing with, she is still with her point to live in zaman Rasullulah. yes, who doesnt want to live with the most precious person ever right?but the point is will you be the chosen one to be in Islam? :|
then, I stop from arguing more. sebab I know, it's useless to debate with someone who always wanna win :) I've grown up though :P

grown up

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

I've changed :)

to someone better.

I guess.

I'm not the one who likes to complain much but rather look that thing in deep.
I dont simply judge anything without having proof on it.
and, the most changes I've made is

I dont really into arguing things

like before :)
it's not that I'm too weak to voice out my opinion.
it's just that, your third class minded making me feels like, it's worthless to debate on :)

ive grown up :)

stop

bismilahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

have you ever set your mind to stop on something you've been working for over a years?or perhaps, in your entire life?
and, the moment when you've given up, that thing came to you without you're asking for?
okayy mengarut,,
I dah set my mind to stop looking for him, but then, a few second later, he came across :(
dude, I dont want to see yor face lahh!
cop!he is in my mind -.-" I set my mind to think of him -_____-"
ya Allah. the better I know him, the more annoy i feel..
entah laa,
I feel like Allah is giving me the sign that he's not the one, but, I, me, myself keep praying that he would be mine again :(
am I trying to deny the fate?
hurmm~

play hard huh?

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

blessed friday~
done with computerised accounting :S
but, seriously :'(
I dont think I've done my very best :'(
owh, okay, a wise friend of mine said,
result is out of our control, our job is just to try for the best..
tapi, u know how stress it is when you're aiming too high, yet, the only thing you can do is just hoping?
yes, hoping for a miracle :')
I'm just too weak to standstil on these testes ya Allah, please guide me :')

AIS paper just now is like too hard for me !
I dont expect that kind of question will be tested,
the question is like, senang ya amat!
yes, this is not in sarcasm tone tauu!
seriously, it is toooo easy that my mind cant digest the question :|
my brain had been trained on critical thinking though~
andd, the topic that i didnt expect to come out, keluar pulak!
i dont even think to really focus on inventory's chapter,
and, pathetically, i can say that, almost all of the question are asking about inventory :'(
cause I dont expect inventory will be tested!that topic is just too lame to be tested kowt!hurmm,
lesson learn,
life isn't always as what we expect, so be prepared..
andd!there was a couple of times when I skipped studying some topic, but he said, "dont miss anything while you still have the chance to read, you dont know what's the question is gonna be right?sometimes, the one you simply neglect is the one that are going to be tested"
yes, indeed my dear :'( lesson learnt :\

i dah serik :'( next week will be FAR paper, dont mess with cik ct!
I'm gonna do the best!I'm going to boil the textbook and drink the boiled water!I'm gonna absorb all the information into my brian till there's nothing left!!!!!!!!so, FAR, be prepared, once I've set my mind, there's nothing can stop me! #ahh, konon~

never a regret

bismilahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :')

I never had a friend who always remind me of Allah :')
ya Allah, please protect them, help them in everything they do :')
knowing them is the best part of my life here :')
I just dont know if I can stand this strong next sem :|
Im gonna miss them badly,,
ya Allah, if only i have a chance to meet them early,,
if only I had a chance to have them longer than this :|
it would be much appreciated :')

first ever senior that i knew in uitm is,
kak nina,
she never allow us to call her akak,
yeah, it's bit annoying at first, dah tua tu x na di panggil akak pulak,
tapi, as the friendship grew stronger,
I can accept the fact that, lahh, tua bbrp bulan je pun, no wonder la she dont want us to call her kakak :P
but, sometimes, I ter panggil dia kakak jugak,
as sense of respect :')
she's awesome!
she would always help me regarding uitm system..
seriously, even I'm asking about silly question!
she would always have the answer,she never fail to reply any of my message :')
she's the one whi introduce eqps to me, how to renew borrowed books from library, PEERS, be my information counter in every semester..seriously, I know nothing about those system if she isnt there to help :')
i can still remember when i ask her, how excel lab test is gonna be, then, she replied,
"nanty dia bg kte soklan, pstu kte jwb laa"
lawakk kann?
then i replied,
"jwpn tu siesly lawakk -.-" mmg la nnty dye bg kte soklan, pstu kte jwb, x perna pulak dye bg jwpn, kte tnye soklan -.-" "
ya Allah, please ease her way :') I'm surely gonna miss her next sem :'(

then, Allah made me to meet this one akak,
kak rahmah :)
ilaa introduce her to me,
we went for usrah,
masa first time jumpa tu, I ask her aloottt of question regarding Islam, yes, like im new sister in islam pulak -.-" tapii, what impres me is, she would always have the answer to get me back to islam..
she made me clear about islam, well, I found the beauty of Islam after meeting her. islam has the answer on every of my silly stupidos questionss :')
the way she talk is just too nice that i melted :*
I would always make myself free whenever she invite me to meet up :')
sebab, she's kinda busy,,so, any of her free time is precious for me.
I have to make myself free even if im busy..
well,she's part6 from science programme..
ive seen how busy science's student are,
they got atleast 9 paper every sem, and, their daily routine is doing lab report that would never finished until they grad :| glad that ive left the science world :)

thenn,
I met kak ayu :')
akak nie lagi buat my heart melt!
the way she talks is just tooo sweettttt!
mula2 tu I was like malas na berkenalan dengan akak baru,
enough of having kak rahmah seorang, I dont need any elses,,
tapi, as time flies, i opened my heart for her, mana tahu, she is as great as kak rahmah,
yess, indeed :')
the way she talks is just too soft and nice..
eventhough we're meeting only a couple of times, tapi, I never regret any of the meetings
she tought me the value of life :') never underestimes people :')
i can still remember the night before muet, I met her. for the first time.officially :')
I was too stress of all the problems,and, what a relief feeling after meeting her :*
we talked about many things :')
precious~

andd,lastly, the most important person that i would never ever regret of knowing her is,
EZAA :')
i've never got a friend who as concern as you!
ahh kau ezaa!dont be that nice to me lahh!
it made me crying even worst!
i just cant forget how we used to spend time together back in mrsm langkawee :')
i can still remember,u helped me searching for my slipper, while i just sit there and cry like a lil kid losing her mom at the mall :'D
ingat lagi, when i was too lazy to climb the stairs at night that i spent the whole night at your room..
and you would always welcomed me :')
i can still remember, you saw a mole on my tapak kaki,and what a suprise that you got it one too..cuma, i kat tapak kaki kanan, you kat tapak kaki kiri, at the same spot! well, i guess, that made us complete :P hahah, gayy -.-"
eh, whenever i stare at my tapak kaki, seeing the tahi lalat, it would automatically remind me of you :)
hahah!pandang tapak kaki teringat ezaa -,-"
ingat lagi when we used to go to dewan selera late whenever they are serving nasi lemak..sebab hoping that we can get extra nasi lemak!hahah,,ahh yes!you dont eat mee goreng!pernah muntah beriya sebab i paksa u try to eat mee -.-" still rasa bersalah nie -____-"
ahhh ! i miss you lahh !hurmm~

ya Allah, please protect them from any harm..make ease of their way.. may our friendship till jannah :')
#ehh, konon tak na online dahh, nak final konon, tapi, keep updating entry jugak~well, gen y can hardly apart from internet -.-" cant deny it~

final battle

bismilahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :')

i have nothing to update,
final is just around the corner,
and, I haven't start studying. yet.
ive made the timetable, so it will be more organised. tapi!
i just dont know why, the spirit to start open the booksss havent arived yet :(
*maybe the flight delayed due to storm in US*
erm erm,
tetibe this words cross my mind,
"afraid of losing someone when he's not even yours"
what a pathetic feeling :|
lahaii, I CAN STAND ON MY OWN LAHH!
pfffffttt~

*take a deep breath*

okay, tadi kann, tadi, just now, this noon,
my key was left in the locker, and, I accidently, had locked the locker, without even realise that the keys is in the locker. and, I'm sooo brilliant to the max which i put the spare key IN THE LOCKER!
yess, I know I'm soooo intelligent~ please be jelly -___________-
dah laa I put all my stuff in the locker!I cannot do any of my routine today as everything that i need is in there :(
then, I search for any keys that might be suit to my key that it can open the lock, tapi, semua hampa..
I was just thinking of, if only I have a hammer :') everything would be easier,,
na pecah kan pintu locker pun i tak mampu :'(
kalau lahh abah was there :') mesti solved,,
then, I terpaksa laa, went down to UPK and make a report. so that, abg mantenance would come and be the savior :D hukhuk~
ahh!dasar perempuan lemahh~hurmm,,
i tak tahu lah kenapa kann,
this sem, I really relies on others, I dont as independent as before :(
the level of laziness is like overwhelming my body!
and the worst is, I can smell that my pointer could probably decline :|
that day, I called eza, I was just too stress..
speaking about hope,destiny and faith
I simply lost each of them.
terukk kann?
dah laa,
I dont want to even think of it again :')
Allah made it this way cik ct! you have to be patient! remember, pintu rezeki Allah tu luas!
hurmm,
hoping for the best this sem :')
as I went to the library, I can see that there's alot of students who has start revising :\
and, the question is, when I can be one?
the situation is totally different this sem, kalau sem lepas tu, I was too excited to really work hard so that I can pass with flying colours. and, I will entitle to get the fast track,, my self motivation is too high that I can cope with all the shitty surroundings. because I know, I wont be facing it in the future. I wont be in Jengka dahh, you may do everything. It wont bring me down. I dont even care of any miserable things that happen around me. sebab my focus is just one. I want to get an excelent result, and leave jengka for fast track! tapii, as you know, from my previous post. I was crying like an insane that UITM had abolished the right to pursue fast track. and, as the result, I HAVE to face all the bullshitness for the rest of 3 semesters!
I dont know how to stand in this hell anymore when the only reason for me of staying here had lost..
I lose the HOPE..
it is sad to know that, all your hardship are worthless. so, here I'm..
sitting here, on my bed, typing this entry, wasting her time, and havent start studying for finals!
ya Allah,,I'm really afraid this attitude will bring me down :|
ahh!I'm just being too paranoid !
erm, susah jugak kalau ada mindset yg sangat firm nie kann?
I need someone to wake me up!
ahh, see?"I need someone" again, she's not independent as before..
owh tidak2!
I DONT NEED ANYONE AS LONG AS I HAVE ALLAH!
I CAN STAND ON MY OWN!
I CAN FLY WITOUT YOU LAHH!
all i need is to live my life (eza,2013)

yeahh!attention attention!
please make a way!
this cik ct has waken up!
she's all ready to burn the laziness and start move her ass to fight in the war!
lets the battle begin!
to the victory here we goo!
I study for my religion, my race and my pride!

accountant muslimah here we go!
may Allah bless me, insyaAllah :')
eh, ingat tauu, Allah sngt sweet to me :*

*this might be the last entry for me (as soon as the finals end, I will start posting again insyaAllah)
pray for me yeahh! May Allah help me in this journey towards victory.


nahh, last word,

smart people dont push themselves to study,
they have strategies !

another leaver :')

i takk boleh :'(
i just cant :'(
i just cant see those pictures of you guys, flying to overseas..
it burst the tears :'(
i wish im the one :'(
ya Allah, make me strong enough to stand the pain,,
please make firm of my heart that this is the best way for me :') insyaAllah :")

*NAI*

 

*sarah*

GOODLUCK kalian :')
have a safe journey
may Allah protect and bless you guys..
grabb all the chances in Japan!
i remember NAI once said to me,
"life is about, once you get a chance, grab it!"
i miss you NAI :')

mom, study week, him

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

alhamdullilah :) it's friday :)
I'm still alive :)

okay, i dont have any idea to write,erm, lets see what interest you the most, ermm,
guys?mom?STUDY WEEK?
okay, lets start with mom,
heheh,
I dont know how my life gonna be if ever god take her :')
she's like my diary bergerak :')
always there to hear the problems, sharing gossips, giving advise infact being my consultant in every thing i did :')
ya Allah, you may take everything from me, but not her :') my life gonna be misrable without her. love her the way she loves me from the day i were born till today :')

then, study week starts today!
hurm, feeling nervous!
well, we only have 4 finals paper!
account, computerised account, cost accounting and economics,
seen it?
3 account related paper -_____-"
im gonna be dead meat :s
paling cuak of course, FAR 250!
i wise friend said to me,
kalau dulu kau x score account paper, you may say i didnt have account basic back in spm, but now,
since we're learning new account sylibus, which spm student didnt learn as well, kalau kau x score jugak, dont blame for the basics, kau tu yang memang x pandai akaun actually!erk~
okay, indeed~
so, i have to really struggle!seriously i cuak, mentor and sifu cant help much since sifu said, he's totally lost in this semester, he cant catch up in every subjects too. mentor pulak, "ty  pun macam blur2 far kali nie, i cant help you since i cant help myself neither" :'(
okayy, the moment when even the top scorer cant understand the subject -___-"
sigh~
dear cik ct!wake up wake up!you have to help yourself!dont depend on others~
okay, too bad to mention, sem ini i banyak depend on others. i just dont know why :'(
im no more independent cik ct :(
hurmm...
eh, boringg right??lets jump to more interesting gossips!heheh,,
eh, before that, NAI and sara are flying to japan today :'( good luck and have a safe journey :')
*wondering when do my time comes*

next gossip,
entahla, i think i've moved onnn :)
i think im wayyy too good to fit you!ahahah~
what makes you guys different is, you're too social. i cant stand with you, ingat takk dulu i once compare the two of you,,not much differences, both brilliant, have vision and superb. tapi what makes you lil bit behind is that, dia got religion :) eh, bukan na cakap u tak ada agama, tapi, your way of life is like bit far from islam. itu makes me look up at dia. yes, dia. no more you :') but, whatever it is, im still glad to know you :) you're so much things i ever had. and i never regret those precious moment being with you :) it is just that, let us remain friend forever :')
ya Allah, perhaps, i can forget him is because of dia.glupp~
i know You are the best planner, but if I have the right to choose, I would like to have him ya Allah :')
please make my wish come true :* eh~
kbai~

I got nothing to be jealous of

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

sometimes, it's hard to live in the most humble way.
I tried to be one, i would possibly avoid showing off any good deed that i did.
hurmm, it's hard to live in the center of popularity
people would always look at you,
they would judge any of your doings, especially if you've done something bad..
and, it's too bad, if they still holding on your bad attitude, even if you've changed :(

okay, tak tak, that's not the point..
actually,
I could smell something fishy,eh sala, i can feel that she's jealous of me.
well, girl, i'm nothing to be jealous of!
dont treat me that way, Its making me worst. i dont want to be labeled as riak infront of Allah :(
ya Allah, please protect me from feeling riak :(
hurmm,

one day,
a lecturer call me, and, I never neglect any incoming calls, sebab, that call might be important for the caller. atleast, if I really dont have a chance to answer that call, I would try to leave a message stating that, I cant answer the call cuz I'm class, or what..

okay, erm,
masa tu, our club advisor call me, asking about peer andd, informing about the claim has been approved sebagai,
and, one of my friend nie heard the conversation between me and madam,
then, x semena2, as soon as I ended the call, she ask me,
"madam kol ke?"
"yes, asking bout ***" then, 5 min later, she ask me again,
"when did you receive the call?"
"huh?just now ?"
"yeah, when is the exact time?"
"i dont know,basically, around 5 min before,"
"lahh, cant you just look at the time when you receive the call?"
"lahh?for what?erm, 3.30"
"owh, no wonder, madam call me first, but i didnt answer it cuz my phone was on silent, that's why she call you"
and, I was like, huhhh???
babe, what's the point???I dont get it -______-" kau na ckp, kau lagi penting that madam kol you first ke apa?
seriously,i dont get it -_______________________-"

then, tadi, I was asking my classmate when will be maf's test sebagai, while holding my phone, as if someone is asking me thru the phone, and, I need to get the answer as soon as possible.
pastu, out of a sudden, yan said,
"ain, nak jugak"
"what?"
"the message that you sent to zaty tu"
"huh?ain tanya cuz, i want to set in my reminder laa"
"lahh, she said, that you're informing zaty about the test"
nampak takk?
she always judge me on everything i do, she loves to create her own assumption towards me :'(
babe, what's your problem huh? assumption yang kau buat tu macam kau jeles dengan ain je, why not kau ask myself about what I;m doing rather than making speculation on me !
and, as if yea pun i text zaty telling her about the test, kau peduli apa?
your attitude make me thinks that,
kau jeles,and always na compare diri kau dengan ain, right?
you always wonder what am i doing.
busybody~
well, correct me if im wrong :s

and, ary tu ada la jugak,
I just got back from kononnya la studying,
tak semena2, she told my fried as soon as they saw me,
"ain study pun na bawak beg"
okay, during that moment,
i didnt tell anybody where im from, it's like, I've been missing from early in the morning, wearing a pyjama, with my beg.
the truth is, yes, i pergi study(lah konon) tapii,
tak perlu kowt kau na mention kat semua orang yang ain baru balek study!
kau ad prove ke na tuduh ain study huh? <-- huh, weird, I get angry when people accused me of doing good deed.
like seriously, i hate it when people know what i'm doing!
kau tak ya na busybody boleh?????
kalau tahu tu, senyap2 je, dont let others know !
and, apa point kau ckp "ain study pun na bwk beg"
what's the point???
dah kalau na study mesti la bawak beg kann?
hello, my beg is like poket doraemon okayy!
it contains everything that i need,
infact pergi mana2 pun, i will always bring my beg,
dalam tu ada segala macam, calculator, pencil case, diary, mineral water, mp3, purse, specs, semuaa laa! I cant simply left any of them!

haihh, stress duduk dengan orang macam ni :s