kekedutan atau kekedekutan?

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

it has been awhile since my last updates, well, it's holiday dude!
I dont have much time to spend here, updating some crap :P
*okay, kalau dekat uitm I have alot of time to waste,heheh :P

okay, my post today is about my habit which is, I dont like to spend money,
the title should be kekedekutan, but, when you pronounce it quicker, it sounds like "kekedutan"

okay, enough about the title,

erm, since I;m so eager to start my new semester on 10th may, I've listed some things for the preparation, ceritanya, lagi about 3 months, I'll be going 20th, so no more 'teen' years. jadi, I bercita2 lah kononnya want to lose some weight. kononnya lahh kann -___-
so, I've made a schedule that MUST be followed in order to reach the target!
I think this is most suitable meals for me,

breakfast : anlene + oat + raisin + dates (okay, breakfast is the most important meal before I start my day!harapnya I dont skip the breakfast *actualy I never skip a glass of milk before going to class pun :) cuma kali ini, it has oat added, nak kuruskan :P )
lunch : no need! I want to spend time for a nap. well, someone told me, a nap in the afternoon gives you energy to do some works at evening sebenarnya, no lunch means save moneys :P *see? kedekutan pertama -.-"
dinner : any masakan yang macik dm tu da masak, ambil 1 senduk sahaja! make sure the price dont exceed rm1! fried rice is much prefered, because we're malaysian, cant be saperated from our ruji. lagi 1, ianya mengenyangkan :)
supper : okay, as for this, people said, a cup of hot chocolate boleh membantu membuatkan mata mengantuk, jadi, in order to sleep tight, milo + anlene + oat will do :) oat tu kira memang kena makan pagi and malam, WAJIB. so, milo to replace chocolate, anlene for bones while aot for not feeling starving! heheh,,
okay, itu dari segi makanan. done.
*owh okay, lupa! the reward. you can go to pasar rabu to spend utmost rm5 there :) pasar sabtu tak boleh sebab ada transportation charge lagi!hehe..

sebenarnya kann,
I've calculated the budget for the fifth semester, and I have about 1.4k left after deducting the fees, and other expenses. tapi tak tolak duit buku and top up lagi laa. so let say, that will cost me the balance 400. so, I think, I want to save 300 into my RHB sebab entahla kenapa, I tak boleh tengok any of my account yang balance dia zero -.-" tapi actually, I have another acount yang balance dia zero jugak which is maybank, tapi, if I want to keep the money in maybank, I have to atleast save 500 there. kalau tak nanti balance dia takk cantik -___- yes. number plays the biggest role in my life -.-" mak cakap "kaklong nie kalau nanti gaji dia rm8033, yang rm33 tu je boleh buat belanja, kalau keluar lebih2 nanti nombor dye x cantik dalam bank tu" yes, indeed mom -_____-" even now, i've seen the tanda-tanda :O huhu,,jadinya, I dont know how to divide the money equally so that semua account I mendapat kasih sayang yang sama rata -.-" harharhar~

owh yes, I planned to buy a crocs before balek kampus ni, tapi, tak jadi kowt. sebab sayang na keluarkan duit yang dah cantik nombornya dlm akaun tu -.-"
I figured out something about me now, I jenis yang akan kumpul duit to buy something, but in the end, bila duit tu dah cukup, I rasa sayang na spend the money which ended up just keep the money rather than buying the things which the money been collected for. sadis kan hidup -_______-
susahnya lah jadi orang yang kedekut -.-"
I pernah merayau 1 KL masa bulan puasa semata-mata na compare harga sehelai tudung yang mana offers the lowest price with the same quality. last2 nya, tak jadi beli jugak sebab harga tudung tu rm25, tp akak tu bg less to rm18, tapi I mintak rm15, kalau x, I dont want to buy. mmg takk la harga tudung 25, na bg 15 kann?hahahah!last2nya x beli jugak. hari tu, I went to jalan TAR lagi, going to the same shop. harga tudung tu was actually 20! tapi that akak bagi less to 18, owhh!so, my advice is, janganlah buat preparation raya masa ramadhan. all the price will be marked up gilaa la!

jadi, itulah kisahnya kekedekutan saya -_____-

nazar yang memakan diri

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

I'm in bigg trouble !
okay, the truth is,me myself who dig my own grave on the first place -_____-"

okay, in islam, we have a sort of promise, so-called nazar. which means, a promise to Allah,
once He had grant your wish, then you have to fulfil your promise towards Him,
okay, what is it called 'nazar yang memakan diri', is that, I mati-mati tak percaya I will get it, so, I made a nazar, sebab, I'm tired, tired of getting the same result no matter how much my effort was. terukkannn :(
begini,
I was definitely sure that, I will never get an A for my account paper,
sebab, I had once get high carrymarks, but in the end, the result wont make any different.
still, I got B for my account paper. so, I was like giving up -_-"

when I was in first semester,I got the lowest carrymark for that subject. praise to Allah ! it doesnt make me weak :) alhamdulillah,miracle happen. I manage to get A- in the end. masa tu terkejut gilaa! I must have gotten fullmark for my finals ! hehe..

when I was in second semester, I got a high carrymarks, but, pathetically, the final paper wasnt that easy for me. mungkin sebab I was too confident that I will get an A for my final, sebab dulu carrymark pun the lowest, still boleh dapat A, apatah lagi kalau carrymark tinggi kann? the paranoia me~ sekali takk :'( the same thing goes when I was in 3rd semester, I like the subject, I'm energatic, confident and positive. sebab I want to pursue fast track. tapi, walau sekuat mana I usaha, seems like account isnt for me :'( I got B+ for that subject.

hence, so, jadi, I was like giving up. dengan riak takbur sombongnya, I bernazar, if ever I got an A, alteast A- lahh let say kann, I will treat anybody who involves in the making of 'that A' . sebab, I was pretty sure I will definitely never get A ! never !

sekali, the reveal day comes! (dah macam clean house da -.-) okayy, I opened up my email, and., here we go :) I got A- for my account paper!yeayyy nayyy -.-" told someone about the result, and got back the reminder, how about yr nazar cik ct? -.-" okay okay, how am I suppose to do meyh :(

okayy, lets just fulfil it right :)

cumaa, erm, I dont know how -_____- sebab, ramaiii kowttt!hahah~

okayy,lagi mory nyaa,
I used to get closed with somebody, a guy obviously.
and, everything seems so easy that time, cuma, there was a mistake that I would never expect it to be this serious until we became a stranger to each other.
as time flies, our life goes on, pretending that it wont give any impact to my life. despite how much I still want the old him. I heard he's now a succeeded man :) alhamdullilah, you get your life back when we were apart. and I, declining the stairs of victory, it seems like, you dont need me to succeed, but I do. kann? lame me talking nonsense :') entah macam mana, tiba-tiba, we get back together, and, during that time, I was about to leave. seeing your achievements make me envy you the most. and, it's better for me to leave. I tried so much to create the most meaningful memory during my last time being there. so, when I leave, I have something to reminisce for. I think that, the best solution for us is, to be far apart from each other.. and, for me, I believe, there is something huge waiting for me out there. okayy cukup. and guess what, as we be friend again, he lost focus. and I think, I'm the factor :/ we should never be together I guess :/ despite how much I still need you as my friend because, I see me inside you~ cuma, I dont want you to keep failing :/ *******

there is only 1 mission

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

ehem ehem,
if I have an opportunity to ask anything I want, and , for sure, I'll be granted for it,
I really, really want to go somewhere in US or aussie to do my bachelor,

and, IF I have to sacrifice anything of my belonging, I will definately let go of it.
seriously!
yes, I'm willing to sacrifice anything to get what I want,
and, it's proven. based on my experiance back when I was young.
I pernah lepaskan jawatan, pangkat, kedudukan,enjoyness ( such a typical dramatic budak ni~ )
but, it's serious.
dulu, I was eager to go to boarding school. infact, I've already got everything in my previous school which is SMART. I'm pengawas koperasi, dealing with money, holding a possition, liked by teachers, one of the best student(kononlahh kan), best friendss, active in kawad, that teacher susan want me to hold an important position jugak la dalam organizational chart of BSMM. secured life.  kalau na difikirkan, what else do I look for, right? I have everything.
tapi, I left those, for the thing that I really want, which is to go to a boarding school. taking risk !
yes, I know, what if, I cant survive there, people said that hostel life is tough. dah la langkawee tu jaoh ! but,since I eager to further my studies there, I kuatkan semangat. for me, there is no point of return once I step into my mission. if I want something, I definately will go for it. nothing can stop me !

sampailah sekarang,
abah pernah offered me to take a driving class, but I resist. since I'm not intrested in driving.
entah, macam malas, I rather take a public transport to go anywhere around KL.
gadget gadget gadget.
I'm not interested in any of it.
let it be, samsung, nokia, BB, apple, macbook or whatsoever sophisticated gadget, it wont buy me :P
I just wanna further my studies abroad :') pleaseee~

*honestly, I'm writing this because I get sicked when people always ask me why am I still using the old+lame+not-so-wow stuff as if I ni sengkek sangat x berduit na beli. and, yes, I muak dengan orang yang asyik dengan material, sampai lupa dia tu menghabiskan harta mak ayah. I can see that most of my friend in Jengka are that type, looking someone elses wealth, kaya, porpular, adik retis, itu yang dipandang tinggi. iyanya memualkan! sampailah satu ketika, I pernah SENGAJA menyepahkan slip baki akaun lepas withdraw duit tu atas meja to show to my roomates that I'm not that papa kedana x mampu na beli those good phones. jadi selepas ini, sila jangan bertanya kenapa ain tidak menukar handphone or lappy, or camera, or apa-apa sahaja.

 s.e.k.i.a.n.

He always have something :')

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamalaikum :)

alhamdullilah, thank you Allah !
thank you sangat sangat :')

yes, maybe Allah dont grant you something that you really hopes for, but, in return, He gives you something else :)

I dah macam na sujud syukur, and text all the lectures that had contribute all their effort to teach me regardless it's 1.39am!
and, suddenly I stopped, kalau iyaa pun gembira, jangan la na menggangu masa tidur orang kann, hehe,,

ya Allah, okay, nazar is still gonna be nazar,
I promised to Allah to donate any book that I got an A for that subject,
but, suddenly I feel so happy, that I want to simply give all the books to my junior !
ahh, I dont feel sleepy now :')
I'm just too happy,
may this success comes with bless from Allah :')

owh, yes, not to forget, all 'le classmates yang dah bersusah payah mengajar budak yang susah nak diajar ni :')
without those stressness, hard life that making me even tough than before, I truly wont come to this stage,(ahh, macam lah dah secure the most precious victory kann -.-") tapi, thanx sesangat !
to lectures, cikgu, mentor, mantee, study groupmates, classmates, senior, junior, PEERS of course!
but, most of all, thank you to mak and abah for praying the best for me :)
ahh :'( what else should I ask . having all these is just too much for me :')
thank you Allah :')
thank you sangat2 :')

newsss

bismillahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)

general election is over :)
tapi, as usual, there will be the smartest political analysts who wants to give out their opinion,
ahh, manusia, mana pernah berhenti mengata, well, we cant make everyone satisfy :)

tapi lah kann, seriously, if someone ask me which party will I vote, I'll definately have no idea,
kalau BN, they have bangla nation who will vote for them, if PR, they only have us, the malaysian to vote for them, so, I rasa, I akan give my vote to PR,
tapi, to look back to what BN have done in harmonizing the country,stability, all the malays reserve sebagai, I think I should vote for BN, ahh, entah laa, as for my place in Taman Keramat, they said, Shaari sugib is a good person, so as Azmin, my mum said, they both always come to our surau. and, if they do, they would never talk about politics, like berkempen dalam surau tu ke apa. respect~

ehem ehem,
so, as for today,actually, I've got 2 news,
I dont know if it is a good news orrr badd news.
BN will govern the country,
andd,
the second news,
MUET result has released :(
and, it's always sipi2 for me,
always~
*ahh kau takk bersyukur!

what ever it is, still, I dont want to repeat it :)
kalau recheck tu, ermm,M.A.Y.B.E,, KOWT, idk~

ehem ehem, so I, hereby, would like to congratulate myself for achieving a good result than before :'D seriously, to think of it, the questions are deadly hardest than any of the question in the world (bajet hiperbola) tapi, I manage to improve my marks, eventhough it doesnt pass the border :')
paling bangga, my speaking test :) menaik half! nasib tak dapat 46 out of 45 -.-"

so, the next awaiting result, is, tomorrow,
I'm going to send my sister for her interview.
how I jealous much of her, muda-muda lagi dah ada experiance being interviewed,
where me, only the mock interview back in mrsm langkawee dulu,hurmm..

then, the upcoming result lagi, is on 9th may :s
*na taip tarikh tu pun berdebar jantung rasa -.-"
ya Allah, I hope to hear a good news on this day,
walaupun after I made my own presumption, macam takk nampak bayang2,
blackout~ ahahah!

this is my second time :'(

bismillahirahmanirahim and asslamualaikum :)

yaAllah :'(
it feels like I'm the biggest loserr ever,
the moment when you know that, you've tried harder, but the result will still be the same,
am I not trying harder ?
ya Allah,
to be truth, I feel like giving up :'(

dia macam rasa na hentak kepala kat dinding berkali2 sampai pecah and cry all day long, reminising the old good days when everything will be at my side, yaAllah, betapa tidak bersyukurnya aku dahulu :'(

*sampai label pun x tahu na letak apa, betapa depress nya :'(

MJSC GAGS

bissmilahirahmanirahim and assalamualaikum :)
ya Allah :')
I dont know why, the tear foes down everytime I scrolled MJSC's gag comics :')

yes, semua memang betull sangat2,

you should click here and scroll to read the comics ,and re-read, and re-read :')
all those memories are so true, and I, somehow miss it damn much :')