last minute studies

student's life -.-
always procrastinating!
I had FAR150 test just now..
and it freaking me out as I just study bout it before sitting for test!
I got nervous and and,whenever I got butterflies in the stomach,
I feel like vomitting!
haihh, plus, I even got stuck on the first question too -.-"
but luckily, I've call my parents to pray for me before the test starts
and it keeps me to standstil in the hall :)

and lagii story mory,,
zaty and me just cannot get along!
its like anjing and kucing *ofcourse I'm the cat laa ;P
okay, I dont expect people to always listen to my instruction..
but, I always been thinking that my idea, is always superb! *uhh, puhhliss -.-"
that's what I think laa,
but,,I still can listen to others opinion too :)
cume, speak it out, dont just talking behind me -.-
or I might not know my mistakes la knn?
ohh, people, please act like you're adult !
voice it out! dont hide your opinion inside your heart..
dont blame me for my braveness :D
yang penting, confident! :)
so chill babeh :) I dont care if you dont agree with me,
but please support your disagreeness with point and example..
cause I cant think of the weakness of my idea :D
ni laa jadinya bila buku bertemu ruas :)
but, please bear this in mind,
I never simply give up when debating with you :P

skipping isn't bajet

yeah yeah yeah, I konw, there's so much spelling error, 

mis use of word and what-so-ever mistake of the title,

here is the right one

"speaking isn't showing off"

yadda yadda :D

some people might think that malay who's speaking in english

is showing off like he or she

is the only person in the world who can speak well.

and this rubbish thought only been conclude by malay's itself

WHY ?

hey! please change your opinion towards 'em

if we keep those kuno's opinion,

sampai bila melayu na maju then?

english is a need !

we cant survive in this such world wihout knowing english kan?

yeah yeah, bahasa syurga pown x khatam, na bajet2 skipping

see ?

how can you improve huh?

look, superb in english doesn't mean that you cannot

recite the Quran or learn 'em in deep..

sambil menyelam makan ikan laa

we do need quran as a preparation in the hereafter..

but, we cant necglet the importance of english

as we still live in world,we're not die yet..

kalau da mati mane boleh blaja quran lagi -.-

haihh, so you can learn both when you're still alive..

islam didn't prohibit you to learn english as well kan?

so, actually there's so much thing that can be argue with,

especially when scientist talk to religous person,

conservative vs native *eh, ade ke?

but, in islam,

we do need both..

english and arabic is a must! indahnya ISLAM ^o^

so, back to our topic :) atas nie is just an introduction :D

okay, what makes me here is,

I had a fight with my friend here

*sort of bertikam lidah because of english

I still believes that speaking english isn't bajet

and she thought of the opposite

we cannot simply speaking in front of nenek2 and atuk2,

unless they understand what you are talking about..

you can suit the environmemt

when, where and to whom you can speak in english..

and, she's saying that I'm showing off when

I write a comment on her facebook status.

okay, is she old enough that cant even understand what I wrote?

hello,I'm talking to University's student okay?

ex-mrsm lagii..

so I dont think that I'm showing off,

because I thought she understand that when university's student speak in english,it's not awkward situation kan?plus, she's ex-mrsm..

haihh, this makes me miss langkawi so much !

I can stil remember when my seniorita said that,

"people outside is jealous of us, they will say that ex-langkawee is bajet, show off bagai, just because we're fluence english.."

hello, dont blame us for that :P

our environment thought us to be like what we are now..

and, she further add up,

"dont make it as an obstacle to keep talking in english, one day they will understand that we're actually preparing ourselves to confront the world :)"

aaaaaa ! I MISS LIVING AND THAT PULAUUU !

when everybody is encouraging others to speak,

never judge 'em as bajet,

in fact, they correct the mistakes too..

and, I dont feel shy to speak

eventhough I know, my grammar is totaly embarrassing,

and it is proven in my blog writing :)

but, who cares ?

we never know we're wrong until someone comes and correct them up kan?

atleast, I'm brave enough to show the mistake to public,

in sake, if there's anybody spot the mistake,

they can correct me,

othewise, I might use the wrong english over thousands times !

so, to you, youngster, nenek na habaq mai nasihat nie,,

dont ever feel shy to speak !

*kan da skipping omputih, nenek modern cam tu laa ;P

and and and,

here's some tips on how you can start speaks english ,

this is what I do laa, just for sharing ;)

-read the subtitle when u watch cerekarama on TV3, or whatsoever cerita melayu that have english subtitle..

you will gain more new word, and try to read it outlloud with full of emotion and correct intonation. then you will feel the easiness of speaking *but, only do it when you're watching alone, or you might interupt others focus ;D

-watch more english movie. look at their pronounciation, the slang they are using. over sabdu of pronounsing 'R', and my advice is, do watch english UK's movie, because our english are based on UK standardise *even its hard..US slang is more leisure and easy to follow. you can use US slang to speak, but, UK's more polite. *but, I prefer US laa ;)

-starts to write your diary in english, eventhough you have to refer to dictionary..me too, I have dictionary beside me :) yeah yeah yeah, people nowadays dont use diary anymore, they prefer blogging, so, write your blog in english then ;) *tapi kalau da emo tu kelua jugak bhse ibunda ;P

-rojak when speaking. it is adviseable to speak rojak at first, because, people around you might have culture shock when you eventually speaking kan? they might confused as if they live in london pulak *tapi kalau setakat yes no okay alright tu, baik x payah -.-" *eh eh, okay je, but, varie your word as time past..you can't use yes no yes no all the time =.="

-for girls, I'm sure that major of them loves novel, I mean, malay's novel..so, choose novel that mix the bahasa, novel cinta pun apa salanya ;) hlovate <3 okay, I dont read novel much, but, hlovate inspire me alot !most of her story's about overseas student, studies, love...and, it encourage me to be like the character in the novel, studying abroad ! InsyaAllah :) *err, I'm not her marketing manager tauu :P tapi, bacalahh :)

-stop listening to those jiwang karat malay's song! like,owh, puhhliss! no use laa -.- I used to learn english by songs too. and, bukan na bajet, tp, I dont have malay's song in my mp. and and, most of my songs,are the old version english song. celine dion, kelly clarkson, akon..because, their pronounciation is easy to follow. sepatah-sepatah.  and the meaning of the song is easy to understand too..and, celine dion is the best laa, cause, her english are not ruin by the intervention of new weird word like, them --> 'em , want to --> wanna, and so much more that I dont even have much time to write them all :) againn, I'm  not dion's marketing manager :P

-lastly, DONT FEEL SHY. muka tebal sikit. biaq pi depa na kata pa. as long as, you are ready to confront the world ;) heheh :D

relationship :)

first of all,
let me tell you how sweet it's to have a relationship with overseas student :)
* couple is prohibited ! so lets just being sort of teman-tapi-mesra then :P
first,, you wont spend much on credit because,
you wont dare to call him or force him to call you or allowing him to call you
as in you;re being too concern about his bills getting dilambung-lambung right?
so the sweet way is for the couple to keep the story mory until a week,
then only being told to each other during weekend..
there's so much things to share about..
you can hang over him over hours,
maybe some of you out there disagree with my opinion,but,lets think for awhile,
it's such a lame thing to share everyday,like,"dah makan ke belum?", "buat ape tu"
like,hey!we're all do the same routine everyday laa,
so no need to ask such a stupidos question laa kn?wasting your credit laa -.-
and of course we do have skype, fb video call thiggy,buttt,still,phone call is the most convenient way I guess :)
andd,you dont have much time to argue with..
because the short conversation on the phone is too short to argue about any crap thiggy
nahh!you wont get fight with him kn?
yeah yeah yeah,kalau x gaduh x manis la hubungan tu kn?
haihh,what's the point of getting fight almost everyday then?
then,there's no time to date,
nahh,you will save your time hanging out with your family and friends
the most precious time is having date once a year,only after the homecoming :)
and,you can spend much time on your studies too..
thenn,yg nie paling ain suka !
it will encourage you to study hard !
I bet you must have the jelousy inside right?
he;s studying oversea, and you're just malaysian graduate..
the point is,layak ke aku na bersama dye?there're so much girl out there who's studying abroad just like him :( so, dont just giving up babeh! mke sure you got the chance to fly too! berdiri sama tinggi, duduk sama rendah :)
but,,
how long can you keep the strong love feeling inside your heart
when you dont even know what he's doin' there.?flirting around in deep..
are you strong enough to go with the relation?
if yes, then good :)
if no,then ?
keeps strong babeh :')

seterrresss !

tu je la yg mampu na ckp..
haish..
x tau stress sbb ape!
mybe chemistry da delay seminggu!tanda2 da bnyk, emo2, jururawat!*dey!ain x na jd doktor laa..durh~
haish, menyampah gile2 plak kat geng2 bermasalah tu!
kau x puas aty ape weyh!
ingat mood ak nie sentiase baik tuk tahan ngan prangai korunk ke?!
ya Allah, berat nye laa dugaan nie..
tp, ingat ye cik ct, Allah x kan uji hamba Nya itu sesuai dgn kemampuan dye..
so chill babeh! :( *still x bahagia..

sangat menyentuh perasaan :')

okey, nie bukan na bercerita pasal seseowg buat confession ke ape ekk,
nie pasal nasihat menasihati :D
lately nie, ain bnyk la jugak bertanya pasal dosa pahala, syurga neraka
dekat sowg ustaz, wlpn x di iktiraf, tp I think dye layak kowt tu memegang title tu,
even he's not that perfect =="
erm, ain ade tnye, pasal kalau kte bg gelaran kat somebody, like, kuno, ayam semua tu, dosa kn?
tp, ain bg name2 cam tu sbb, nnty if ktowg na gosip pasal dowg tyme jalan2 na g klaz ke ape ke, takot ade owg denga, and, takot nnty cam ter meng aib kn si empunya gelaran ke kan, so thats the purpose of giving those nickname,sbb ktowg bkn nye panggil si empunya gelaran depan2 ke ape..cume guna nama2 tu tuk bergosip dalam kalangan ktowg..still dosa ke?

pastu, dye balas,
yup,, klu org pggl ko bdoh kat blkg ko mrh x?? mst mrh kan,, sme la ngn die ain,, ko akn akan lg bnyk dosa sbb ko ckp ssuatu yg bebnar tntng die,, mngmpat ade 3 jenis,1.mngmpat untuk mmlukan die 2. mngmpat untuk kita ng thu rkn2 spaya ambil iktibar 3. mngmnpat bg muhasbh dri kita spya x wat bnda yg sme yg die pnh wat dhulu,, lg 1 klu kita pnggal nme kwn kita sdngkan die x ske sthu aq haram,, cbe ko tnye yg lbh arif,,

okay, yg ain dah bold kan tu!
ce bce dengan betol,with full of emotion and correct pronounciation
macam lembut je gaya dye bg pandangan kan?
like, really really really concern bout me, cam, sangat na bg jwpn yg terbaik regarding my question..
haih,x tau la na ckp cane, tp, the way dye ckp, mmg sangat menusuk kalbu, I even cry kowt!sangat2 terharu..x tau la npe..mybe dye dah fuhh fuhh kat ain supaya denga nasihat dye ke ape ke, tp, siesly,kelebutan dalam memberi nasihat dye tu buatkn ain rse "yes!I've found the ryte turning point now, so, I wanna change to be a better person starting from now onward"

*kalau Allah tu dah bukak pintu hati seseorang, dengan cara apa pun dye akan dapatkan nya

like,mungkin inilah masanya, ain kena berubah!so, InsyaAllah, ain dah x na mengumpat lagi dah..no more gelaran2 sume tu..pray for me yea guyz :)
pastu, adala bnyk lgi soalan2 pasal keagamaan yg ain tnye,
tp, yg laen2 tu biasa2 je..x menyentuh kalbu sangat..hehe..ade la sikit2 menyentuh cuma x fully tersentuh * okey, pape je la, sentuh2 kau tu -.-" :P
pasal solat yg kte dah tinggalkan, how to qada = stiap kali solat wajib, qada skali..
like, after solat subuh wajib, buat qada subuh..atleast kte buat, than nothing,even da lupe bpe juta kali ditinggalkan
pastu pasal dosa mengumpat owg x kira mangsa, dye kate, kalau x bley minx maaf direct, kte maafkan la owg sekeliling kte, in the sake of, other will 4give us too..ni la susa kalau na mengutuk x kira mangsa!kan dah susa na minx maaf :(
pastu pasal syurga neraka, Allah x judge someone tu based on solat dye je..in fact semua amalan pown Allah kira..so, jgn buat solat je, tambah2 skali dgn amalan2 sampingan, semoga, kte dpt belas kasihan Nya nnty tuk masuk syurga :')
insyaAllah ye tuan2 dan puan2, kita sama2 lah berjemaah dalam menuju wawasan 2020..eh!sala2..kite berjemaah ke arah kebaikan :)

p/s: eh, lupa na ckp, spe ustaz bertuah yg berjaya embuka pintu hati nie :D
dye badar ldp mrsm pekan :) hehe..fikir la sendiri :P

LAYAK KE AKU?

okay, I just dont know what's happening to me right now,

its like, I have tahap kemurungan yg tidak diundang :(

I feel so afraid in everything I do..

buat setiap perkara, msty dengan peno islamic nya..

mulakan dengan "bismillahirahmanirahim"

jalan g kelas sambil berzikir,

"allahu akbar, lahaulawalaqu wataIllahillali'il azim,"

stiap kali jugak msty na berselawat..

and 1 thing that I realize, ura2 pasal 2012 seriously affect my daily life..

ain x na jd hipokrit!

takot klau semua yg ain buat nie cuma sekadar takut bala yg akan tiba..

bile lepas tu, terus jd terok :(

nauzubbillah..

hurmm..lusa dah 7 jan..

kte tengok la ape yg di perkatakan owg semua tu btoi ke x..

yg pasti, I just wanna be with my family..mak abah syada sara..

stiap kali sembahyang pown doa tuk dowg je..

ain da x kesa pasal kawen ke x, exam pass ke x..

sbb ain rse, dunia da x lama, so, ain na kejar akhirat..tp mampu ke?

and, stiap kali fikir bencana yg akan tiba, ain cuma fikir dosa2 ain yg banyak tu :(

banyak sangat laa klau na redeem balek..

and somehow, ain rse, dah x larat sngt dah..

amalan sehari2 kena buat jugak, and in the same time, kena qada' balek solat2 yg dlu2..

yg ain ingat, taun lepas, lepas birthday, ain sengaje tinggal solat, 2 ary, and subuh 3 kali..

tu x qada' lagi tu..

belum lgi solat2 yg selama nie ain tinggalkan tp dah lupe bpe juta kali..

sempat ke na qada' semua nie?

kalau x sempat, ain cnfrm2 masok neraka ke?

ya Allah, aku macam dah boleh rasa je api tu menyambar2 kat blakang nie..

sempat ke aku na tebus balek segala kesalahan?segala dosa?tu belom lgi dosa mengumpat :(

somehow, I wish I were never born..

sbb aku sebenarnya x mampu ya Allah :(

berat sangat dugaan dan cabaran kat dunia nie..

buat ape aku lahir kalau sekadar utk jd bahan bakar di neraka?

rse, better kalau aku mati cepat..
tp kalau btol2 kau tarik nyawa aku, cane dgn dosa2 selama nie?bnyk lgi x di redeem..
tp kalau lagi lama aku hidup, aku akan terus2an buat dosa kan?
ya Allah, lindungi la aku :") because I just dont know what to seek from you :(
1 je yg aku percaya, kau akan sentiasa bg yg terbaik tuk aku..
tp, kalau mati itu terbaik tuk aku,
bg la kesempatan tuk aku qada' semua solat2 yg aku tinggalkan,
even ak x ingat dah brape kali..
eh, baru teringat,
ada kisah yg sowg alim nie, x masok syurga jgak sbb dye na sngt kira ikot amalan dye tuk msok syurga, bkn sbb belas kasihan Allah..
so, ain kena seek for belas kasihan Allah ke?
tp,dosa ain kan banyak, layak ke na dpt belas Allah?
ain nie da la slalu meminta2 kat Allah, tp sangat sikit bg kat Allah,
bg ape yg Allah mintak, that's SOLAT, AMALAN2 MULIA semua tu..
cane??
Allah nak ke owg x guna cam ain nie menghuni syurga dye?
layak ke ain tuk tmpt cam tu?
tp, ain x na jugak dok kat neraka Allah :'(
kalau dapat dok kat longkang syurga pown ain sanggup.
kat pintu masok pown jdi la, even x dpt merayau2 kat dlm tu..asalkan x g neraka :'(
persoalan nye, LAYAK KE AKU??
ya Allah, kau bersimpati la ke atas aku..
wlpn aku tahu aku x layak tuk itu ats segala dosa yg aku dah buat..please ya Allah :")