haihh, I dont know why, but, I used to think bout death lately :(
fikir yang bukan2 je :'(
abah ?
haihh, IDK IDK!
it starts when abah offered me to take driving class. then, just now, abah cakap,
"kaklong, you have to take driving class cause, abah will go to india for a week nanty, and, no one can fetch you and your sisters to go anywhere, cause mak been too afraid to drive. just see your makcik after his husband died dulu, she have to take care of everything bout her family, it's hard to survive when you got no lisence nowadays"
like, what?
hey!abah will go to india JUST for a week okay ! we can go to anywhere by taxi, lrt or bus if mak is too afraid to drive! besides, I will always accompany mak to fetch syada and sara from school or tuition. you dont have to think bout us here,
andd, it become worst when he further add up, "you have to take care of our family since you're the eldest"
NO ! I dont want to take care of our family! I dont want to :'"( it's your obligation to take care of us!
you cannot die! you have to still alive to take care of us cause I'm not going to take care of them without you!
and, lagi, the day when I wnet back home, I said to him, "abah, shave yr mustache, you looks older tau, and, uban tu, tolong la inai rambut! seriously, you looks older.." then he simply say, "I am older now, 51 already" huh? he is? macam tak percaya je :( I only hopes that he will just be 30th forever. dear abah, you're not old yet :') kaklong takk kawen lagi, abah mane boleh tua, cause, only grandfather can be labelled as tua.. please pray for my abah ehh :''( he will not going to die before me :'( cause I really need him by my side :') I have nobody else than him :'( and, do pray for my mum too :') I have nobody else than my parents :'(
Ya, Allah, please dont take abah and mak before I send them to mekkah to perfom haji by my own money :')
please ya Allah, I only have you to fulfil my do'a. I have nobody else in this world other than abah, mak, syada and sara. please dont take them from me. cause I dont know how to face the life without them :'(
InsyaAllah, abah akan panjang umur, murah rezeki, kaklong doakan :') hurmmm..
*okay, stop crying cik ct!
